Sarojs Panorama

Hair tales

2012-01-04T15:14:00.000-08:00

.Today I had my haircut. I went to the new hair saloon near my house, that has opened recently. They were offering an opening discount, so I decided to try them out. I was greeted by a handsome young Arab( I knew he was Arab the moment I heard his accent in Norwegian) . Sure enough he is from Lebanon. I was in his saloon for almost two hours and during the course of my stay, the young guy told me so many things. And as usual when something gets my attention, I blog about it.
He had a theory about the reason for the high divorce rate in Oslo among people with Arabic background. He blames the TV and internet for it. And the gender equality that Norway is famous for.
According to him the serials and the porn sites are teaching young people today how a relationship between a man and woman should be. According to him, men are actively using internet( read porn sites) and then later when they get married to some nice Arab girl, she is a disapppointment coz she hasn't seen all that. He told me that it happened to many people he knew. The adults had to sit and tell the girl what the man wants in order to save the marriage.

I just sat there, nodding in silence. After all my hair was at his mercy. Besides, I didn't know what to say. Then I asked him how would a guy react if his wife knew all that he knew and had gotten her education from the internet too? He laughed and admitted that she would raise questions.
" See, there is no pleasing the Arab man! Either way you lose!" I couldn't help my laughter.

Luckily , he got the point and laughed too.
Then he said that the Arab men also feel that the woman no longer asks a mans permission here if she has to go anywhere. She may be docile in the beginning but later once she starts mingling with the locals, she starts to come and go as she pleases.
" A man just wants her to ask him...please, may I go see a friend or whatever...He won't say no, but just the fact that she asks, makes him feel important."

"Ah, is that what a man wants..to feel improtant? " I asked him with an impish grin.
" But yes." he gave me a serious look.
He was so earnest in his beliefs, I didn't have the heart to bring out all my feminist arsenal. I had no idea that just asking a man's permission to do something could have actually saved many a marriage. It turned out to be a day of more than getting new hair tails but getting real hair tales.

Don2 - a slick action thriller from Bollywood

2011-12-29T07:22:00.000-08:00

Last night I watched Don 2 and since the movie has received mixed reviews I was really not sure what (not) to expect. And going by Shahrukh Khans previous debacle Ra.One, I was a bit sceptical. But hold your horses.
The first opening scene where Khan looks damn sexy in dreads and plays out the Jackie Chan action had me bowled over at once (am no big fan but neither am I super critical to SRK).
He had me in the palm of his hands after that and from there on I was ready to forgive and overlook the inevitable small indiscrepancies in the otherwise well written script and brilliantly directed film!

The plot is well knitted with enough action and suspense to keep you wanting to know what's next . The beautiful scenes of Europe and Thailand make it a worthwile ride.
The drug cartel of Europe want Don dead because he is stealing their business. Don hatches a plot of his own and surrenders himself to police inspector Om Puri and his associate Roma (Priyanka Chopra) in Malaysia. Priyanka still holds the torch for him and the Don has a soft spot for her. He befriends an old rival in jail Vardhaan (Boman Irani) who is still nursing a grudge against the him. Don and Vardhaan escape the prison by poisoning all the inmates and go to Zurich , Switzerland, where Don meets his girlfriend and trusted companion, Ayesha ( Lara Dutta). They make a plan to blackmail the vice president of a Bank and steal the plates that are used in printing money bills. Thus starts a tale of adventure with many twists and turns and betrayals and thrills. And as Don says" It is not just difficult to catch Don but it is impossible". The lines are taken from the original Don film made in 1978, starring the undisputably greatest Don in any Bollywood film, Amitabh Bachchan. And comparisions are justified when SRK takes on a role that is played by Amitabh Bachchan with his characteristic deep baritone and menacing eyes.
SRK looks wily, cold and ruthless and seems to relish being mean as the Don but I waited for that one menacing look that would have catapulted him up to the level of the Great Amitabh Bachchan but ah, he comes close. Very close...
Farhan Akhtar is a brilliant film maker and once again he gives us a well made Bollywood film. However, the plot falls short of being perfect because of certain flaws in the script. For instance, when Don drives away with B.K Diwan in the middle of a party where he is the guest of honour, Roma chases after them in a car. Later she tries to figure out who was the man in the car with Don. When such an incident occurs in a gala event and the guest of honour goes missing, the first thing the police does is not let any guests leave so that they can figure out who is missing. But in the film everyone just ran after the Don. That was just silly.

Another flaw in the story was that while the crafty Don churns out one plan after another revealing a cunning stratgey behind his each move, the police seemed to have no strategy to catch a criminal of such intelligence. The Don plays Tom and Jerry games with them and they come off as puzzled and naive police officers merely letting Don run the whole game. Had the script also focused on a strategy the police followed and tried to beat the Don at his own game, the plot would have been perfect but you need a Martin Scorsese (the best of the best) for that. However Farhan Akhtar does throw in a few surprises and the climax is well executed.
Priyanka Chopra sleepwalks through the film looking more like a pretty girl- next- door than a police officer with a determination to catch the Don. She fails to match the fiery Don and you are left wondering why he keeps calling her "meri junglee billi" (my wild cat). Her character calls for more passion, since Roma has a love- hate relationship with the Don. Priyanka comes off as a tame pussycat, instead of a wild cat spitting fire and fury. She is boring and predictable. Lara Dutta on the other hand looks gorgeous and pulls off the guest role as Dons girlfriend and trusted aide.
But why waste such a great actor like Om Puri on such an insignificant role? He was reduced to the role of a mild about- to- be- retired gandpa. C'mon, you cannot do this to his fans!

SRK is back in business. You love him as the wicked and slimey Don. There are scenes where he looks smug with his annoying smirky smile but as I wrote earlier, I was in a more forgiving mood after the first scene. As the film progresses and the thrilling action scenes unfold, my mood got more generous. I am notorious for sleeping during films, but Don 2 had me wide awake and my eyes glued to the Silver screen for more action.
The fight scenes and the action is upto Hollywood level for a Bollywood thriller. It doesn't get any better.
You may love him, you may hate him but you damn well cannot ignore SRK in this film. He seduces, he charms and he thrills but above all he serves you a great Bollywood entertainer. The king is back!

Now if I was sitting as a jury member at the Cannes film festival, I would have given another review. But the point is Bollywood promises you masala movies and entertainment and Don2 gave me plenty of it.
I loved the film and hence I would give it five stars out of six. Now I want to see it in 3D.

Ra- One and the play station generation

2011-10-26T14:46:00.000-07:00

First of all, a very, very Happy Diwali to you, my blog buddies!! May the festival of light bring brightness and happiness in your lives.

Well, this evening I went to see " Ra- One " with my son and a friend of mine and her family.
I would have written the storyline but trust me, it's so thin that if I tell you the plot, I'd be giving away the whole film! But since this is a review, I will try.
Shekhar Subramaniam, a computer programmer makes games. His son is embarrassed by his very un- cool dad and wants his father to create a game where the villain is more powerful than the hero. So, to impress his son, Shekhar creates Ra- One, an evil robot in a computer game. His counterpart is a G- One, the good robot.
Then Ra- One escapes into the real world, Subramaniam dies and G- One pops into the real life too to protect Subramaniams wife and kid, who calls himself Lucifer.
And lo and behold a lot of wild goose chases are created. Then a long sequence at the airport where G- One impresses with some tongue- in- cheek dialogues and funny fight scenes. Fasten your seat belts, you are in for a long ride with a lot of fight scenes and funny dialogues and finally the hit number by Akon" Chammak Challo".
Looks like Sharukh Khan made this film for his kids.
He is cute as the clumsy and nerdy guy with the heart of gold as Shekhar Subramaniam. The problem is we have seen him cute and clumsy many times now. Can he please give us some real acting for a change?
The special effects are very good. But the train scene reminds of Spiderman 2. But then again, when has Bollywood shied away from plagiarism?
Kareena Kapoor looks beautiful as Subramaniams voluptuous trying- hard -to- learn-Tamil Punjabi wife. Thank God, the poor girl has started eating and doesn't look anorexic anymore.
Arjun Rampal was wasted as a guest star towards the end though he looks good, as he always does.
My verdict: this film is for the play station generation. My son enjoyed it. But when asked to rate it on scale from 0 to 10, he gave it a 7. But go see it anyway. It's worth the laughs.

Over analysing

2011-08-05T01:58:00.000-07:00

My son is growing up and sometimes the way he talks back to me makes me finally reaslise how my mom must have felt. Lately, it seems as if I can't do anything right. He is now correcting my Norwegian and openly laughs at my accent at times My carefully and painstakingly built self confidence is in serious danger of going down the toilet.

I was getting quite dismayed that maybe it is a cultural thing since he is grown up here and is very Norwegian. Despite my upbringing in different countries, my identity is essentially Indian. But today, after one such episode where he laughed at me ..in front of his friend, I had a talk with him that I don't like his behaviour. He promised not be so thoughtless. Then it hit me. This has nothing to do with culture clash, it is simply a generation clash.

Living in the west we are constantly focussing, analysing and coming up with explanations on why we look at things differently. But somethings are just plain old generation gap. Readig debates and talks on how youth with other ethnic backgrounds have conflicts with their parents etc etc. one may have forgotten the very obvious . That all children go through a phase where they have huge conflicts with their parents. It's a parent child thing.

I am normally a very patient person but my son can push all my buttons and make me livid with rage. Like yesterday after a walk, I have now decided not look for explanations in our cultural differences but the fact that like all teenagers he is going through a phase where he thinks his mom is silly and does nothing right. Soon he is going to be ashamed of me.

I have always been a cool mom or so I was told. Until recently I made a joke in front of his friends and they all looked at each other and suppressed their smiles. He was so embarrased.
" Stop trying to be cool mom!"
"I am not trying to be cool..I am cool!" I tried my famous wit.

" No you'r not cool...you are old!"

I sat down like a deflated balloon. Finally I have become the silly stupid mom I though my own mother was when I was 11 - 12 years old.It's like deja vu. '
Are we over analysing this debate on our cultural differences?

(Though on some issues it is very relevant but that is another post!)

Terror hits Oslo

2011-07-23T12:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, while driving back from a day trip to Sweden, my friend switched on NRK P 3, the national broadcasting radio, when we heard of bomb blasts in Oslo. Just like five million Norwegians, this news hit me like a punch in the stomach or more accurately , in the heart. Soon my cellphone began to ring. Friends calling to check if I was ok. I live just 10 minutes away from where the bombs exploded. But people living down in Grunerløkka had heard the blast.
I came home and switched on my TV. While we were coming to grips with the horrible blasts in Oslo, where the Parliament office is, the news of massacre in Utøya broke in. With mounting shock we heard of a man, posing as police man shooting down young people gathered in Utøya.

There are 94 casualties, among them are 85 youth who had gathered at the Labour Parties youth camp in Utøya. The massacre in Utøya is probably one of the worst tragedies that has hit Norway. Young people, still in their teens, who are members of the Labour Party , gather once a year for a summer camp.
Imagine, sending your child to such a camp and he or she never returns.Watching TV footage of the surviving young people is heart breakng. And I cannot imagine the pain and despair of those parents who have lost their sons and daughters in this senseless tragedy.
A 32 year old man named Anders Behring Breivik, has been arrested. He is a right wing extremist.

And you know the sad thing is a lot of us foreigners are heaving a huge sigh of relief too. Because many people were very sure that some islamic group is behind this.My Iranian friend and another friend kept saying, it's going to be hard being a dark skinned person in Norway. Until we heard the guy is blond, blue- eyed and ethnic Norwegian. Isn't that really sad? I can so understand how muslims feel everytime there is a bomb blast in India.

Today I went to the Dom Church where hundreds of people had gathered to lay flowers and light a candle for the victims. Oslo was in a sombre mood. A very un-saturday feeling. Saturdays are usually the day, the city comes alive. Shoping malls are full of people and just the general mood is happy because Norwegians like to enjoy in the weekends. But no such feeling today. Walking past Gunerius, it was weird seeing two soldiers cordoning off Central Oslo.
All news channels the world over commented on how peaceful Norway is and they are so right. I have never felt so safe and peaceful in any country I lived in. And I have lived in many countries. Norway is so safe, I often come home walking from downtown at midnight.

Our Prime Minister, Jens Stoltenberg ( often called "Robot Jens" becaus he never shows emotions) was teary eyed on national TV. His voice wavered as he answered the media. All the political parties stand united today. Even Siv Jensen, the leader of Progressive Party ( FrP) said on national TV that today we are all a part of the youth organisation of the Labour Party.

This tragedy has united us all.
We have to stand united againt terror and not give in to fear. But above all, we must not allow som gun- totting terrorist to take away our sense of peace and security.
The young people who have lost their lives are our heroes. May God grant their parents the strength and courage to bear the pain. I cannot even begin to imagine what they must be going through. 22 July 2011 will go down in Norwegian history as a tragic day. A day terror hit peaceful Oslo.

Just a lazy sunday

2011-07-10T02:24:00.000-07:00

Does this happen to you? You wake up and are full of plans for a sunday...and then you end up drinking lots of chai, couched on the sofa, zapping between channels? And from time to time logging on to Facebook just to see what's going on?

Well, I have most weekends like this. I make a thousand plans, to clean, organise and just get things done but it all happens in my head. They say that people who procastinate are actaully perfectionists...well, I must be one hell of a perfectionist then !!!

Anyway, I am already on my second cup of tea and watching re- runs of " Frasier" on TV Zebra and now am writing this post during a break. I have written a lot of pots but they are all in draft. Somehow I can't seem to finish them off.
Anyway, I think am just going to take this for what it is proving to be so far: a real lazy sunday...hope you guys are enjoying yours!!

Oslo

2011-07-02T03:07:00.000-07:00

This is Karl Johan, the street that has lots of cafes and the way to the kings palace
This post is on request by a Realblogger
If you plan to visit Oslo the best advice is to bring a LOT of extra cash with you. Most people get a shock at the prices of food and beverages. But Oslo is counted among the most expensive cities in the world and has topped the list several times. A beer in a restaurant costs atleast 60 kroners! S do what most Norwegians do..start your party at home, or vorspeil as it is called here. Down a few drinks at home or at a friends place before you hit town.
When you are in Oslo these are places you should visit:
The Kings palace on Karl Johan is a nice way to start your trip. The palace is open for public in the summer.

Aker Brygge. I suggest a walk on Aker Brygge, the sea side. It is usually pulsating with life even during the day. The boat bars and restaurants are nice but remember it is one of the most expensive places to eat out.

Oslofjord: Take a boat and see the famous fjords that Norewegians are so proud of. The small islands around Oslo are great places for picnic or swimming. Highly recommended.

Munch Museum: You cannot come to Oslo and not see the paintings by the famous Norwegian artist Edward Munch, specially " The Scream ".

Kon tiki Museum. A good museum where you can see the boats usd by the Vikings

Nobel Peace Centre. Worth a visit and usually there is an exhibition at the centre.

Vigelandspark: The park is magnificent and the sculptures are mind blowing. This is a scuplture of an angry child, Sinnatagen. I didn't understand at first why everyone goes gaga over this statue. Its is famous for the way Vigeland has captured the facial expressions of an angry child. So when you look at the statues, you will be sruck by the expressions on them

The National gallery. If you are into arts, this is worth a visit. Not like the Louvre in Paris but has wonderful paintings.

Sognsvann lake:The lake is a popular place for picinics, walks and swimming during the summer. Very beautiful. You will understand why Norwegians are so proud of their nature.

Ullevålseter : From Sognsvann there is a possibilty to go the top of Ullevålseter and have a coffee at the restaurant there. It is a long uphill walk and you get a great cardio work out on your way to the top. Bring lots of water and some sandwiches with you.

Walk in the woods :The Norwegians love to take walk in the woods and there are some nice woods near Oslo . However don't venture there without a guide as you may get lost. But it is recommended if you like walks etc.

Grønland Torg. It is called the mini Pakistan though I think they should re-name it mini Somalia now! This is a place for cheap food, mostly Indian and Pakistani food. You can buy spices and vegetables you don't see in regular grocery shops. Lots of cafes you can visit.

Holmenkollen . The ski jump is a worth a visit.

The opera. This is absolutely worth a visit.

Dom Kirken. This cathedral down town is beautiful Ouyr crown prince Håkon got married there. It is also a place where refugees have camped to protest against deportation.

Beaches. If the sun is out I recommend the beaches here: Ingerstrand, Katten, Paradis Bukta, Huk ( a beach all those who like great bodies and great tans) There is also a nudist beach nearby for the interested ones!! I had ventrued there once when I was new here ...so of course I beat a hasty retreat!!

Here is an article published in New York Times . So hopefully you have a good trip to Oslo and hey give me a call when you are here...would be fun to meet a fellow blogger.

Ready to be inane

2011-06-04T03:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the world premier of Ready, a Bollywood masala film. So I went to watch it with my son and a couple of friends. Now going by the previous films by Anees Bazam( like No Entry, Thank You etc.) I knew what not to expect...a good storyline, for example.

The movie does make you laugh in some sequences but I gave up trying to figure out a plot with the numerous characters going in and out of scenes. And of course Salman Khan does the sexy numbers Character Dheela and Dhinka Chika, which I assume are rocking the billboard charts back home. And then he doesn't disappoint his fans as he takes off his shirt and asks impishly " maza aya kya?" ( did you enjoy it?). At 45 he stll looks great, with the six packs intact.

But as they say, it is a paisa vasool film for Salman fans and children. My son laughed a lot and loved it. It's good he didin't understand all the jokes with double meanings. Is it just me who thinks such vulgar double jokes are actually considered good humour and something you can watch with your whole family?? But that is another post.
Anyway, this is not a film where you need to think. You just need to hang in there and laugh.

Monarchs are not normal people

2011-06-02T06:28:00.000-07:00

King Carl XVI Gustaf. Photo Milton CJ/ Flickr.com

Well, it's no secret that I am not a big fan of monarchy so my views in this post may seem contradictory but bear with me, please.

The king of Sweden, Carl XVI Gustaf is in troubled waters after the book, Carl XVI Gustaf – Den motvillige monarken (Carl XVI Gustaf – The reluctant monarch) was published in November 2010.

This is what the Telegraph wrote about the book: The book which catalogues his past predilection for wild, alcohol-fuelled orgies and naked jacuzzi parties with models.

The book has caused uproar and dominated the country's media, leading to nationwide soul-searching about the 64-year-old King's role, reputation and right to privacy.

"Strip clubs, illegal clubs, rented ladies who are naked under their fur coats. Women were simply desserts, used as sweets to be served with the coffee," wrote Katrine Kielos in the daily Aftonbladet newspaper.

So now there is a public outcry that the king should abdicate and leave the throne to princess Victoria. Recently the king was interviewed on television and more controversy was sparked by what many call his body language that gave him away. Parallels were drawn to body lanuguage of Bill Clinton, when he denied his affair with Monica Lewinsky.

Now I can understand why the swedes are in this moral outrage- The monarchs of Scandinavia are known to be more upright and minus scandals as compared to the monarchs of other countries in Europe. Besides, King Carl Gustaf did this a long time ago in his bachelor days, so I think they should let it go. My biggest issue with his moral outrage is this: when you choose monarchy it also entails that a king should be above everybody and shouldn't be questioned the same way we question politicians, elected by the people and who are held accountable for their actions. Sure a king should be good moral example but he is not chosen on the basis of his moral character. It is heritage that is the deciding factor here. So definitely, he should have immunities that both politicians and common people don't enjoy.

Back home here, we all know that our own crown Princess Mette Marit has had a very dubious past with cocain and wild parties.. There is allegedly a video out there with some very damaging footage of her. But I think it would be very unfair to judge her today by what she did in her past.
Monarchs have always indulged in decadency. Everyone knows that. So when Europe insists on holding on monarchy despite the fact that it is archaic, it should also swallow the scandals that come with it. Leave the king alone and let him be.

Back on track

2011-05-25T00:16:00.000-07:00

It's been months but finally, I am back! My arm is a lot better, though I am still advised moderate use of the computer. The physiotherapist had thrown a real scare into me, saying my arm was developing into something called a frozen shoulder syndrome but currently its an impingement of the shoulder, hence the pain in my arm when I use it. But lots of treatment and rest has helped.

In the meantime, these weeks have been quite a psychological rollercoaster for me. A lot of new situations have developed and not all of them positive, so I have been quite down emotionally.
But deep inside I am a fighter, so I have decided not to let things get an over hand.
However, it made me realise that one of the most important things in life is our body and health. Your body often starts telling you that you need to slow down but often we are in no mood to listen. Like my arm. I had been having pains since 2009 but I kept pushing it. Until it striked completely. Also mentally, we push ourselves to the limit.
Modern lives are such that there is little room to rest. There is so much pressure also to cram your free time with activities. It's like you don't even get time to catch your breath.

Is it any wonder that people collapse totally? Is it a European thing, I wonder? Back in India, you have safety valves like family, to blow off steam. But here one is supposed to be so independent.

These days I wake in the morning and there are a bunch of pills I have to take- vitamin D , B complex, something for my stomach and something for my hair( losing like crazy) . I used to laugh at people living in Europe taking all kinds of pills and now I am one of them!!! Anyway. the rest and the medicines have paid off and am back on track ( though, not fully).
I miss my blog buddies...hope you guys haven't forgotten me! Will visit all the blogs that I used to read religiously.

Oh- so - nice or not- so nice?

2011-03-21T12:06:00.000-07:00

I once read in a psychology book the following:
If one person tells you you are a horse, you may ignore it.
If two people say you are horse, you may begin to wonder a bit but can still ignore it.
If three people call you a horse, you can have serious doubts.
But if four people call you a horse, start eating hay!!

Sometimes the way we see ourselves is not the same way other people see or perceive us. I have met lots and lots of people who call themselves nice and good people, yet once you get close to them you sometimes get a shock at how that is only their own perception of themselves. I knew one man, who was very bitter and angry with his ex- wife and told me that the problem in their relationship was that he was too nice. Apparently she was a extremely jealous and possessive and that drove him crazy. They divorced eventually, after a bitter break up.After knowing this gentleman for two years as a colleague I discovered how during the course of his marriage he had had a string of affairs. He bragged about the women he had slept with and didn't show even a remote sense of guilt.
I couldn't help but wonder that the tag of Mr Nice didn't exactly fit him, did it?Not in my book, sorry.

Similarly I knew this girl, who always came crying to me saying how others had been mean to her and she was so nice. It was only later I discovered how she was the actual abuser. She used people for what they were worth( eating her room mates food, never buying her own) and just helping herself to anything that she fancied, even if it wasn't hers. She would always cry to me that men dumped her, until I saw how she treated them. She thrived on conflicts and could be mean and abusive.
I would not call her a nice person but in her own eyes she is the nice one and everyone else is mean.

My experience is that the real nice people never go around telling people I am a nice person. They are just themselves and you discover how nice they are. I do know some great people and I have not heard them say even once" Oh I am too nice". Infact, you hear it from others how nice they are.

Yet I cannot help wondering, how can one have such a distorted view of "self"?
Yes, one shouldn't blindly listen to people and believe in oneself, but sometimes one needs to actually stop up and listen to what others say about you.

Skii World Championships 2011

2011-03-04T16:00:00.000-08:00

Petter Northug: The name on everybodys lips . The guy is a SKII - God..

There is just one news that is dominating the newspapers and TV channels these days. The skii championships being held in Holmenkollen, Oslo. The whole country it seems, is glued to the TV or radio to follow the news. Even our prime minister, Jens Stoltenberg, took a break from a meeting to watch Norway win gold medal in cross country. Petter Northug and Marit Bjørgen er two names on everyones lips these days.
Now, am no skii - fan or rather sports fan but when it is world championships I always get curious. So tomorrow I will try and go to the awards ceremony being held in town every evening since the championships began on the 23 february. Sunday 6 March is the last day.
Norwegians have every right to be proud: with 15 medals ( 6 gold, 4 silver and 5 bronze medals) they are on the top of the list.
On Tuesday I had gone to watch the cross country at the Holmenkollen and it was a pretty awesome feeling standing there in the cold with all the people and following the cross country. I must admit my sheer ignorance of the sport but the commentator was pretty good and I understood what was going on. It was fun.
Remids me a little bit of Cricket- fever in India. I was never a fan of the sport but did watch the World championships.

Faith and God

2011-01-29T13:44:00.000-08:00

I had met a friend for coffee a few days back. She is a lovely person. One of the nicest and honest people I know. She is going through a hard time in life at the moment. And it hurts me to see her in so much pain. So after coffee she said something I have been thinking over . She said that she is almost losing faith in God and to her that is the worst thing. I suppose being muslim, having strong faith is essential.

It made me wonder: really, how do you keep your faith in a world where you see children being raped, innocent people suffering and good people getting taken for a ride over and over again?
I have had my dounbts too. If there is God, why is there so much injustice and cruelty in this world?
My friend is not the only good person I have seen in pain. There are so many good people I know who are dished out hardships and sorrows, while cheats and liars are thriving. It really is hard to understand.
I have no answers but I remember when I was going through a real hard time myself a friend of mine told me something that helped me.
" Remember there is a Devil too. If you believe in God, then believe there is a Devil too. Maybe this is all Devils doing, so that we stop having faith in God. "

Well God better come around soon because the Devil's having a party, going by all that is happening in the world.

Marie Amelia

2011-01-16T02:31:00.000-08:00

There is a young girl Marie Amelia who published a book last fall called " Ilegally Norwegian". The book is based on her own life as an illegal immigrant in Norway. Marie came here as a child as a political refugee eight years ago. All these years she has lived here, learnt the language, taken a masters degree in Technology and finally wrote a book. With the publishing of the book, she shot to instant fame. Marie has been all over the Norwegian media as she finally came out of anonymity.

So what happens? The police now knows where she is, what she looks like and two days ago she is arrested. Now she is in jail, waiting for the government to throw her out of the country. Jens Stoltenberg, our prime minister says its only fair to send her back to Russia, where she comes from.

All over Norway thousands of people have demonstrated to show their support for Marie.The government is under pressure from its own membersof parliament who say the law should be changed. Maria was brought here as a child, she had no control over her situation and so she shouldn't be punsihed for it now. Today there are many children who are thrown out of Norway even though they have gone to local schools here and adjusted to this country. Recently around fifty Iraqis were forcibly sent to Iraq, among them many children.

I have written about this earlier and I am not condoning illegal immigration but I do believe that children should be spared. They shouldn't be punished for the decisions their parents make. Marie was a child when she came here , she had n control over her destiny. Another thing is that just because the government decides that a person has no right to political asylum, doesn't mean they are not in danger back in their own countries. Most refugees who seek asylum are from Iraq, Afghanistan and Somalia . It's no secret that these three countries are worn torn, no matter what the government decides.

There are over 18000 people living as illegal immigrants in Norway, many who have had their asylum applications rejected but cannot return home.
Its a prickly issue for any government. Illegal immigrants or granting political refuge to people who don't need it. But loopholes in any law can have huge repercussions in many peoples lives. he law should consider the children who are often innocent pawns in political situations.

Marie Amelia has become the face of helpless illegal immigrants.But the truth is that Marie, who is white, beautiful, very educated, integrated in the society, will manage somehow. It is that much more difficult for who are doomed to a life of uncertainty and despair. They should be granted amnesty.

Muic

2011-01-15T05:54:00.000-08:00

Just posting a hello to by blog buddies: I like this song...hope you like it to. I like the way it fades out in the end:)

Happy 2011

2010-12-31T07:10:00.000-08:00

Wishing all my blog- buddies a very very Happy New Year. Want to thank each and everyone of you for making blogging so much fun! Through your posts I have had the pleasure of having glimpses in your lives, minds and feelings. I never imagined I would connect to so many lovely people through blogging but I am so glad I met all of you in blogsphere. Even though I may not always leave a comment, I always look forward to reading new posts. So here's wishing you all a great year and looking forward to reading your posts. Ciao for now!

New Year resolutions

2010-12-28T03:35:00.000-08:00

In a few days we will leave 2010 behind forever and embrace 2011. How many of you will make new years resolutions? And how many will actually keep them?

I always made new years resolutions. And I write them down so that I kan see which ones I actually managed. Some resolutions are repeated every year( like losing 10 kgs) but by the end of january, it is pushed to the back burner.

Now I have never made resolutions like earning a lot of money. I wonder why? Well, I was never a money minded person. I always focused on people and relationships
But all around me I see how everyone is just after one thing: money. People talk of ideals and principles but scratch the fine words and you will see what really matters to them...it is money!

They say money comes to those who love it. So here is my new years resolution...love money!!
Some resolutions are personal but I will share some with my blogbuddies:
1. Earn more money- lots of money!!
2.Go to the gym 4 times a week( have been going twice or three times a week ) so far.
3.Take care of my health( my arm)
4.Eat more vegetables and daal, less meat
5. Socialise more
6. Organise better
7. Set clear boundaries
8. Write more on my book
9.Remove clutter from home
10. Clean more often in the house

And I just realised one more thing: This is post number 298 since I started blogging. So am going to make it 300 posts before we hit 2011.

Losing weight

2010-12-26T13:23:00.000-08:00

In one of my earlier posts I have written about my ongoing battle with the bulge .
I have tried hard, diets and works out, yoga. You name it. I tried it. But for the first time the flab around my waist is disappearing. Thanks to a great piece of advice I got from a close friend and trust me it has worked.

We Indian women mostly have problems with our midriffs, that expand after having children. Now I have done the crunches and the sit ups but the flab around the belly wouldn't go. I have slim legs, so I never bothered working out a regime to lose weight there.
But here is the secret: To lose belly fat, you need to train your legs and especially do lunges, with weights. Take huge steps and lunge as low as possible. If possible lift weights while doing the lunges. That was what my friend told me. Ok I decided to give it a go! And whoops a month later I am actually detecting a semblance of my once visible waistline.
Another thing is that I was always struggling with my realtionship with food. Now I eat whatever I fancy...i just don't indulge in sweets everyday and eat smaller portions.

And I have been doing Ashtanga yoga too. It is also called Power yoga and trust me, it works.

Christmas

2010-12-24T01:44:00.000-08:00

I have been away for so long...but I needed the break to let my arm heal. It is a lot a better but acts up again when I use it...so things are moving slow but there is progress.

It's Christmas eve today...and yes, I have done my shopping. Would you believe how much an average family in Norway uses just in the month of December? According to a national survey each of us will use 9700 kroners in the month of December. This year the grand total for Christmas shopping will come to 47 billion kroner.

That is just plain sick if it wasn't for the fact that it is so true. Every year I resolve not to indulge in the Christmas extravagant shopping but each year my resolve is broken when I see how my sons eyes light up at the very mention of Christmas. He can't wait till this evening when he opens all the gifts he is going ot get. He knows what he is getting from me coz we ordered it together...a Beyblade from all the way from China!

The part I love about Christmas is the Christmas carols and I have my favourite one too It is just beautiful. I am going to post it here and even though many of you will not understand it...listen to all of it. It is soulful and talks of life on Earth..And yes. a merry Christmas to all my dear blog buddies!

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

2010-11-20T02:10:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I saw the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows with my son who basically bamboozled me into going to the film. Now for some reason I was never able to get into Harry Potter books or films but my son who is ten is a huge fan. So I decided ok, I can go sleep for three hours while the film is going on( I am notoriously known to sleep though films, especially childrens films).

But to my surprise I watched the whole film and fought off the drowsiness that threatened to engulf me a few times.
The special effects are great and Harry Potter and his friends take the viewers through and enchating adventure. I can't summarise the story since I havent seen the other parts and sort of put two and two together so I am just going to link a vidoe with the trailer here. All I can say is that it's worth a watch

Happy Diwali

2010-11-05T10:02:00.000-07:00

It is once a year I feel hindu and its on Diwali! So here is wishing you all a great diwali!

My doctor II

2010-10-19T06:48:00.000-07:00

I wrote an emotional post just a few weeks ago about my doctor who was sick. It is with deep sadness I write that he passed away on 16 October. I read an obituary in the newspaper today. But it was my physiotherapist who told me today when I was there for treatment.

" I think there are many who will miss him". She said. I know I will. There was an empty place among angels in heaven that is filled now. Rest in peace Dr. Morten Nummestad. God bless his soul

Tendonitis.

2010-10-12T07:18:00.000-07:00

A little update to all my blog buddies:

I have been given strict instructions to stay away from computers by me physiotherapist because of a severe tendonitis in my shoulder and arm. Hence few posts lately. I would love to reply to your comments but I will wait till I get better. She has put a huge scare in me sayinf if I don't let the tendons heal, my arm will be permanently damaged!! So am taking this seriously...and typing with left hand isn't easy so that's all for now. Will be back soon. In the meantime I will visit you blogs but may not leave a comment, but I do read your blogs:-). Advice on tendonitis appreciated. Cheers! I will be back!

The Twitter- bug

2010-09-30T09:57:00.000-07:00

The ladies here in Norway have been bitten by the Twitter bug a la Demi Moore. Demi put up her bikini clad picture on the popular social media, calling other women to do the same.
Marianne Aulie is a famous Norwegian artist( am not a fan) did a Demi and put up a pic of herself on Twitter.
So in response a Norwegian journalist Helle Vaagland put up a picture of herself too, but she posed with the tyres around her waist.

Vaagland is being hailed as a hero by many women here as she dares to show her body the way it is ...at forty the wear and tear is more visible, not to mention the havoc childbirth does to your figure!
So next step- Aulie posts total nude pictures of herself on Twitter! Well, Aulie has a model like figure so she can carry it off but I am wondering, what's the real message behind all this?

Frankly, I haven't really followed the whole thing but the debate about the ideal female figure is an old one. And ok Vaagland may have a few kilos extra but she still looks great for a 40 year old woman.

This whole fixation of having a model- figure seems like a superficial problem but when you see the statistcis of young girls starving themselves or think they are fat, it isn't funny.
In my office there are 3 very young girls in the early twenties, all slender, almost thin.
I overheard them talking over lunch about their figure onde say. So I asked the thinnest of them" Seriously, you don't think you need to lose weight, do you?"
She merely giggled but I could see she probably thinks of losing weight too. She actually needs a few extra pounds on her.

Then I remembered how in my teens and twenties I was always dieting and did aerobics four times a week. I was paranoid about eating one ice cream. I was always counting calories back then. And when I look at my old pictures I can see how thin I used to be, yet I was never happy with my body and thought I was fat.

I also looked at pictures of models and wanted to look like Julia Roberts or Brook Shields.

I am still trying to get rid of the extra kilos after I gave birth, but I no longer work out to look like a model. It is more to have better health and to avoid back pains. But when I look at women like Demi Moore and all the body fixation, I feel there are more important issues in life than looking thin at 40.
Why has feminism been reduced to debates about the ideal figure and what clothes to wear?
It's time we women grew up...

My doctor

2010-09-07T12:13:00.000-07:00

Today I got the shocking news that my doctor here is seriously ill and is on sick leave for a long time. I do not know what he is suffering from, since that is privileged information.
His secretary looked at my teary face and said" Well Saroj, he is 66 years old..he isn't getting any younger.."
"He isn't old yet!" I said.
As I sat down in the waiting room, the tears came flooding. I kept telling myself to stop being a cry baby. Here I am an editor, many young girls look upto and so many tell me how strong I am but the tears wouldn't stop.
The truth is he is one person I can always come to whenever things get hard. It is only inside the four walls of his clinic that I let the guard down. I can stop being so strong. Because he always understands. Sometimes he understands things about myself, that even I don't understand.
I remember once when my son was just a baby and I hadn't slept properly for days, he had asked me how am I doing and I had burst into tears. He told me I was doing a great job as a mother and what a strong person I am. As I sat there today , a thousand such incidents flashed through my mind where his words of encouragement would make me feel so much better and I realised just how important he is to me.
Some years ago I was struggling to get a job and was telling him it's difficult being a foreigner and to get a job you are qualified for( there are many reports that confirm this) he had smiled kindly and said.
" I read a report that most Indian women living in Norway are doing good and evetually land up with good jobs so don't worry, you will be fine."
Such words of ecouragement mean so much when you are feeling insecure and struggling in a new country and it's not your culture. You are far away from your family.

I have had doctors before but nobody like him. I don't need a shrik to tell me what's going on here. He is like a father figure to me. He is also one of the kindest, nicest people I have known in my life. Some days he has taken me in even when his day is full of appointments. Another doctor would just tell me to call the following day.

When my turn came and I saw the doctor who is filling his position temporarily I cried some more. She was a young girl with kind blue eyes.Ver y sweet but I am sure it has been tough for her, she has a tough act to follow. Her expression gave me a feeling that I wasn't the first patient freaking out because Dr.N is sick. He is very popular( with good reason). He told me once that some of his patients come from out of Oslo. They take a train to come to him when they are sick.I know I would too, if I moved far away.
I don't know what he is suffering from but I am praying he will be back soon. I even went to the church today and lit a candle for him.
Sorry, this is such an emotional post but am all shaken and upset.

Surrogates from India

2010-08-31T06:51:00.000-07:00

The recent news of a Norwegian woman, Kari Ann Volden stuck in India with her twin babies is a hot topic in living room discussions these days.

Here is the story in a nutshell. A single mother, Kari Ann Volden travels to India and hires a surrogate mother to give birth to twins. She is not alone. In the recent times many childless couples, gay and single parents from all over the world travelled to India to hire surrogates.
The case of Volden is a specially complicated one because being a woman her twins are not automatically made Norwegian citizens, according to the law. The Indian governement will not give the boys a citizenship either so as per today, the babies are stateless.

The Norwegian politicians, specially the conservative Christians, are very against the use of surrogates and are calling it exploitation of the poor women in India.
Yet I feel the case of Kari Ann Volden is a special one. Recent DNA tests revealed that the donor egg used doesn't belong to her, so in reality the babies are not hers genetically. The govt. is now saying that the children cannot be brought to Norway, she may have to adopt them or the other option is to leave them in an orphange in India. What kind of heartless way is this to treat those babies who for some reason have been trapped in the red tapism and the moral questions of surrogacy?
The politicians want to make it impossible to use surrogates in India.

I have had this discussions with two of my friends and they mean that well, rules are rules. Well I am sorry, I strongly disagree. The surrogacy rules were made recently by the goevrnement, so the new rules should not apply to those who already are in India stuck with babies( Volden isn't alone stuck in India with her boys, there are a few others too). And need I remind that rules are meant to serve people. People are not meant to serve the rules. After all, rules can be changed and broken.

Code of ethics for blogger

2010-08-20T00:12:00.000-07:00

I have been blogging for almost two years now and recently a friend reacted to a post I had written.
It made me wonder if I had broken the code of ethics? As a journalist I am very strict with the code of ethics. Yet I feel blogs are personal, though I try not be unethical here.
I do believe that the privacy of a private person has to be respected that is why I keep the people anonymous. Yet, someone recognised this person and objected to the post I had written so I have now removed it from my blog.
My only concern was that the person should stay anonymous but I am not apologetic for my views. They may sound judgmental and harsh to some, but I have reached a point in my life where I don't want to understand people who don't seek help but go around draining their friends or keep making stupid mistakes all their lives.
Sure enough I have made my share of blunders and am not proud of all the choices I made but the point is: you look for solutions and ways to put your life back in order. But if a person is not going to get help and keep making the situation worse, sorry I am not going to take on the role of a psychologist. And as a friend of mine once told me that if you keep supporting friends who need professional help, you actually hinder them from seeking it coz they feel as long as they have a friend they don't need to seek help. The role of a friend is to support and be understanding but when it assumes gigantic proportions and you are pouring all your energy into helping someone, it is an indication that they need more help than what you can give. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.

But it also brought me to the subject of blog ethics. I read many blogs and many write about similar things, keeping the person anonymous. So it is easy to be confused and the lines can blur sometimes.
In any case, social medias has also opened a Panodras box. People have been fired because of their Twitter or Facebook status. So blogs are no exceptions. Yet, I do feel, a blog is also more personal where you can allow yourself to be subjective. I would like to hear your views on this. What do you think?

Hollywood stereotypes

2010-08-12T14:10:00.000-07:00

Shobha De has written a scathing piece on Dev Patels recent interview on Hollywood racism. Her post has prompted me to write this post.

Ms De wrote that Tom Cruise would never make it in Bollywood. But I disagree. If India had a large number of Caucasian people, I am sure Bollywood would be swarming with the likes of Tom Cruise! I mean, after the green- eyed Aishwarya Rai hit the screen, the whole Indian idea of beauty has changed. But that is not what this post is about.
It's about how poor Dev Patel has been ripped apart with criticism for daring to challenge the Hollywood stereotypes. Here is what I wrote to Ms De's post:
I think it was brave of Dev Patel to come out with his statements. Just because the great Omar Sharif had to get a regular job after Hollywood, that makes it ok to cast Asian actors in stereotyped roles? Sorry,ms De, I don't agree. Hollywood needs to change with the times. I mean, America elected Barack Obama to symbolise change, so why should we accept such attitudes as are prevalent in Hollywood?
Dev is right about racism. Please don't mock the poor boy, ms De. He is talented and deserves to be treated better.
It made me think that we so easily accept that this is the way things are and one should just accept it. There are many talented actors in Hollywood who have Afro American , Asian or Arabic background but we only see them in negative roles. My son is a huge fan of Aang, the Avatar in The Last Airbender. We are eagerly waiting for the premiere of the film in Norway in September. But I was dismayed to learn that white actors are playing the good characters in a series that is actually Asian, while Asian actors were chosen to play the bad guys.The demonstrations in Los Angeles prove that many do not agree with this stereotyped projection of a particular group or race.
We all know that in Disney films, all the mean characters have black hair while the good ones are blond and blue eyed (maybe it is out of pure defiance that I love the evil-hearted Scar in my favourite Disney film " The Lion King"...but who can not love Simba???).
Hollywood is prejudiced and it's time it changed too.
If there is any place this can happen it is in America. I do believe that because you may say a lot about the USA but one thing is sure, they made a precedence when they elected Obama for President.
Do you think that would have been possible if Obama had listened to people who told him not to even try because no black person could be in such an important position in the most powerful country in the world?

The first step towards fighting prejudice is to speak up against it. Change is not possible if we continue to accept status quo. So thumbs up to Dev Patel for taking on Hollywoods prejudice.

Mela time

2010-08-07T02:14:00.000-07:00

It's mela time again. Yesterday was the grand opening at the City Town hall. It was very nice . A sort of a fusion between eastern and western music.
I have blogged about desis and their manners a year ago so I won't repeat myself. But yes, they were there, all the snobs, their snootiness packed impeccably in their expensive dresses.
This year I am working in a stand, to promote the newspaper I am working for, so it is a bit different. When you are on a stand it's different. I talk to a lot of people. And the keen journalist that I am, I am always looking for good stories. And the best stories come from people. I have now two ideas for the next issue and I cannot wait to start on them.
I haven't taken pictures yet. But they will come later, hopefully.

I think the whole mela concept is just brilliant. We have artists who are invited from all over the world. Artists who are big stars in their homeland but Norwegians do not know. They only read about war and hunger in our countries so mela is an excellent way to see what the culture is all about. In 2008 year I was lucky enough to hear Miriam Makeba, the famous South African singer, at the mela. The 70 year old star died shortly after her visit to Norway.
This year I am reallly looking forward to the Yousou Nadoor concert tomorrow. I have been a fan since the 90's when he made it big with his famous hit song " 7 Seconds" with Neneh Cherry. There are some other stars from Pakistan who are also coming, among them Amanat Ali who almost won the Indian Idol.
So the mela promises to be fun, as always.

Here is the famous song:

The Mokens

2010-07-28T02:02:00.000-07:00

These days there are three people from Thailand who are visiting Norway. They are the sea gypsies or sea nomads, called the Mokens. When my friend told me about them and showed me the pilot they are making about the Mokens and how they make the boats, called Kabang, I was simply fascinated.
And no prizes for guessing- the Mokens are slowly losing their homes, the Kabang, because the Thai government has banned felling trees. The Mokens make the kabangs with one big tree trunk and live on these boats. The boats are their homes and they live by fishing. Now they have been given modern housing. The kabang is brougt to Norway by the Kon tiki museum that has all the boats( including the Viking ships etc).

The Mokens are an Austronesian ethnic group with about 2,000 to 3,000 members who maintain a nomadic, sea-based culture. They speak their own language which belongs to the Austronesian language family.

The Mokens received a lot of media attention in 2005 as they were the only ones who knew that the tsunami was about to come because they know the sea so well and were thus able to save themselves and many others because they were prepared. Yet the tsunami destroyed many of their kabangs so now many have been moved to live in huts or small flats.
The story of the Mokens is a bit like the story of the film Avatar, except that it is true.

The Burmese and Thai governments have made attempts at assimilating the people into their own culture, but these efforts have met with limited success. Thai Moken have been permanently settled in villages located in the Surin Islands, on the northwestern coast of Phuket Island, and on the nearby Phi Phi islands islands of Krabi province.

Trekking

2010-07-25T01:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went for a five hour trek with a friend. We went to a place called Ullevålseter.
Norwegians are fanatically into outdoor sports. Whenever they have holidays they take off to the mountains in the summers( if they aren't travelling to exoctic countries) or to ski resorts in the winter.
The long trek yesterday was great but after I came home my leg muscles screamed in agony. But it was a great feeling as we trekked along the mountainous paths. We came down using a small narrow path that goes through the woods.
After the initial chatter, we both fell silent as we walked. You could hear the sounds of the nature.
It isn't as if I have never trekked before. I did my first trek in Nepal, many years ago. The Indian embassy had arranged to go to a temple, Manokamna Devi. The only way to get there was to go trekking. They have cable cars for tourists now but back in the 80's the only way to go there was to go trekking.
It was a memorable trek. We were a bunch of people with lots of children of all age groups. We trekked all day long till we came to the temple. It was a small village where the temple was. It was a tiny temple. But the locals believed that all wishes made in the temple come true. Every Nepali wishes to visit the Manokamna temple atleast once in their lifetime. One of my wishes is to visit the temple again, before I get too old.

In Ullevålseter there is a cafe where we sat for an hour, ate our sandwiches and drank coffee. The weather was great and almost tropical. Yet going through the woods was an almost spiritual experience that reminded me of the trek in Nepal , years ago.

Maths undone

2010-07-19T10:02:00.000-07:00

As a mother I was always dreading one thing...how on earth will I help my child with maths homework from the fifth grade onwards?
Yes fifth grade. That was my undoing, when maths became the bane of my life. Up until fifth grade I was somehow sailing along...but fifth grade was when my Maths boat hit the rocks and ...eventually drowned. There was no escape and it only only got worse...I mean algebra and decimals etc. You might as well ask me to speak in Chinese! I was always into fine arts and scored high on essays and history but maths...? I dreaded it. Once in a class test I actaully got a zero! Imagine how the kids laughed and made fun of me. The boys in my class promptly named me "Miss Zero". But soon when I wrote an essay that made the teacher make me read it out loud coz it was so well written, the humiliating name- tag was forgotten.

My father was brilliant in maths. He loved it. He could calculate difficult equations in his head in a few moments ( it was hilarious hearing him calculate in Punjabi but he always got it right!).

So I decided I was going to conquer my old enemy. Maths. I bought a book " Maths for parents, how to help your child in mathematcis". I was elated and was feeling proud of myself and reading it when my son saw it. He flipped through the pages and remarked" hey mom, I know this stuff!"

And then he asked me who does he take after cos he loves maths and is very good in it. I remember once I was helping him do his homework . I asked him to do the calculations on a paper before he writes the answer in his notebook.
" I like to calculate in my head" he answered.
Maybe I will read the book anyway..who knows I may actuaully understand the formulas this time?

Riots by asylum seekers in Lier

2010-07-08T14:36:00.000-07:00

Tuesday night two refugee camps or rather a camp for those who are waiting to be deported out of Norway, were set on fire by angry asylum seekers.
The politicians in Norway are now saying they will be thrown out as soon as possible. Not a single politician has shown understanding for the people living in camps.

This was a time bomb, waiting to go off according to NOAS( The Norwegian Organisation for asylum seekers) and Anti racism Center.
The subject of asylum seekers is a highly inflammable one. No politician dares to even hint at a more humane policy when it comes to dealing with asylum seekers for fear of losing public opinion. The majority of people are so strongly against anyone getting asylum in Norway that it can make or break political careers in the present climate of hate towards refugees.
So obviously not one politician has even suggested looking into why this happened? What caused so much frustration that people set the place on fire and went on a rampage?
When I was studying journalism I had done a paper on refugees, based on a report that was released at that time, describing how the children lived in refugee camps in Norway. Later I even visited a camp in Torshov. The guy who was in charge there and who had daily contact with the refugees told me he had a hard time looking at kids in the camps, especially since he is father himself.
This report revealed just how terrible the conditions were for both the children and adults.
As long as the government policy is based on one assumption, that those seeking asylum are coming to Norway simply because of the welfare state and do not have the legitimate right to seek asylum, the situation will only get worse.

I am sometimes appalled at how some of my Norwegian friends seem to think it is ok to let children live in abominable conditions, simply because they are refugees. It is almost like to be considered a human being you have to be Norwegian. Anyone else is just a cheat, liar and out to take advantage of the State.
The truth is that many of these asylum seekers who have been rejected cannot return to their homeland. Iran for example is a country who doesn't take back those who didn't get asylum.
So many of them have been rendered stateless and without any rights at all. They are pushed to leave Norway but they have nowhere to go. Many of them languish in such temporary camps and some of them go crazy.
According to reports, many of these people who rioted on Tuesday, were harassed by the local people in Lier, who call them all sorts of names. If they ask for more toilet paper, they are simply told to leave the country by the employees.
They are considered lesser human beings simply because the government has decided they do not have a valid reason to seek asylum. Even though many come from countries like Somalia, Iraq and Iran that we know are war torn and people are running away from these countries. They run anywhere. Yemen has over 700.000 Somalian refugees and Yemen is a poor country!
The governemnt is patting itself on the back because the number of people seeking asylum has gone down considerably since last year. Obviously, such inhumane treatment is having effect.
The worse part is that the riots were a desperate cry for help but instead the government has decided to punish the rioteers. The question is, if the deportation of many is not possible because their homeland doesn't accept them, will they be living in such temporary camps, under these deplorable conditions? And for how long?
Some countries are actually granting amnesty to such people who have nowhere to go. Until that happens, many will be forced into a life of crime and some may go berserk.

The World Cup- The thrill of the moment

2010-07-03T13:57:00.000-07:00

I don't know how many of you guys are watching the World Cup but I am all into it.
Yesterdays match between Ghana and Uruguay was one of the best matches in the series.

This year the World Cup has been a surprise with a lot of underdog teams making it both in the series and the quarter finals. Ghana had my full support and they played much much better than the Uruguay team but damn Suares and his hand. But Dominic missing the penalty kick was the pits! I mean missing a penalty kick in the World Cup must be absolutely the worst feeling for a player. Ghana would have gone to the semi- finals if it hadn't been for that terrible faux- pas.

Today the Germans pulverised Argentina out of the World Cup with a humiliating defeat. We watched the match in the park nearby on a full screen, like yesterday. It was a totally different feeling watching it with a lot of people. Yesterday the crowd was mostly for Ghana except for a handful, cheering on Uruguay. But today, there were quite a few German fans and they went wild after the victory. I was praying for Argentina...

But the real disappointment came yesterday when Brazil was stunned out of the series by the Dutch.
I have a sneaky feeling we will see the finals between the Germans and the Dutch and my bet is it will be Germany who will win the Cup this year.

The match between Spain and Paraguay was quite interesting. But Spain will be thrashed by Germany in the semi- finals. I kinda want the Dutch to win...Schneider and his head kick was quite a thrilling moment. But the German team is formidable.

Today I was thinking a football match is like a film in a way. There is action, there are the heroes and the villains, and the drama and the thrill of the moment. Then there are happy endings ( Germany) and there are sad endings( Ghana). Emotions run high as big strong men break down into tears after losing a match. Then there is glamour too: I mean, those football players with those legs and thigh muscles, their well trained muscles rippling powerfully in the throes of a match...have you seen anything so beautiful?
So lets' watch and see who wins the World Cup. My bet is on Germany. But you never know what happens...it is football!!

Colourful Saturday in Oslo

2010-06-26T11:24:00.000-07:00

Today is the Gay Parade day here in Oslo. The organisation for gay peoples rights (LLH) in Norway, moved the parade to Grønland, an area which is a so-called muslim town. Last year, a huge debate was kicked off in media after a gay couple was kicked and abused by a man who told them that Grønland was a muslim city and gay people are not welcome there.
So LLH decided to take the city back, hence the parade.
I was in town when the parade went off and I saw my colleague in the procession and waved to him.
My son was grumbling about the heat and wanting to go away. Never one to lose an opportunity to sermonise I explained to him what homosexuality is and that gay people shouldn't be discriminated for who they are. He was still grumbling about the heat.

Tag and an award

2010-06-24T09:53:00.000-07:00

I was tagged by Zillionbig and it was fun doing this tag so try it out!!

1. Asked someone to marry you? Guilty. He said no..ha ha ha! I was 11 years old!!

2. Ever kissed someone of the same sex? Innocent.

3. Danced on a table in a bar?Guilty. Those were the days!

4. Ever told a lie? Guilty. To avoid getting grounded.

5. Kissed a picture? Guilty. I kiss my sons pictures all the time, much to his embarrassment.

6.Slept in until 5 PM? Innocnet.

7. Fallen asleep at work/school? Guilty.

8. Held a snake? Innocent. But have touched them at a zoo.

9. Been suspended from school? Innocent. I was miss goody-two-shoes.

10. Worked at a fast food restaurant? Innocent.

11. Stolen from a store? Innocent.

12. Been fired from a job? Innocent.

13. Done something you regret? Innocent. I only regret the things I didn't do. But regret only lasts a mood swing.

14. Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? Guilty.

15. Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Guilty.

16. Kissed in the rain? Guilty. That's all I will reveal!

17. Sat on a roof top? Guilty.

18. Kissed someone you shouldn’t? Innocent.

19. Sang in the shower? Guilty. My parents had to bang the door to get me out coz I was so busy singing!!

20. Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?Guilty. I was ten years old when one uncleji thought this was a way to teach me to overcome my fear of water. I still can't swim, coz I can't relax in the water.

21. Shaved your head?Innocent. Vain about my hair so will never do a Sinead O'Connor though I think she looked beautiful.

22. Had a boxing membership? Innocent. Boxing and me?

23. Made a girlfriend/ boyfriend cry? Guilty. But he was a big cry-baby and it didn't take much for the Ganges in his eyes to flow!! Needless to say he was eventually dumped. I don't want a dude who cries more than me, yaar!!

24. Been in a band? Innocent.

25. Shot a gun? Innocent.

26. Donated blood? Guilty.

27. Eaten alligator meat? Innocent.

28. Eaten cheesecake? Guilty.

29. Still love someone you shouldn’t? Guilty.

31. Have/had a tattoo? Innocent. But I always dream of getting one.

32. Been too honest? Guilty. Like the time I asked a conceited girl if she had acne? She hasn't forgiven me to this day!!

33. Ruined a surprise? Guilty. All the time.

34. Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you couldn’t walk afterward? Innocent. Hopefully it will never happen.

35. Erased someone in your friends list? Guilty. Many times.

36. Dressed in a woman’s clothes (if you’re a guy) or man’s clothes (if you’re a girl)? Innocent.

37. Joined a pageant? Innocent.

38. Been told that you’re handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said? Guilty.

39. Had communication with your ex?Guilty. We have a child so ...

40. Got totally drunk on the night before exam?Innocent.

41. Got totally angry that you cried so hard? Guilty. My ex and I had a huge fight and I was so angry I wanted to give him lots of gaalis( cuss words) but I couldn't so I burst into tears.

And I tag:
Nazish Rehman
Neena Sharma
This is that

Am not able to link your blogs because of a problem am having with my pc.

Midsummer night

2010-06-24T02:31:00.000-07:00

On 23 June it is the longest day in Scandinavia. It's called St Hans evening here. People celebrate it since the days get shorter after that. Oslo is a bit chilly because of the rains but otherwise the sun sets after 10.30 pm. The days are so long. I like this part of the year. It feels like a reward by the nature for the long and dark winter.
I went to the nearby park St. Hans Haugen to celebrate it with some friends and to catch the concert for climate awareness.It was a good evening. Lots of music, lots of people and happy children running around in the park. They had activities for the kids which was fun( though a bit tiring to go treasure hunting in the big park ) . All around Norway people have celebrated last night by lighting a bonfire. After this the days get shorter as the sun turns and we move towards the long and dark winter.

I took this picture from my mobile yesterday.

The royal wedding in Sweden

2010-06-19T11:19:00.000-07:00

Princess Victoria of Sweden is getting married today, so all the monarchs are gathered in Sweden to celebrate the wedding.
Let me state one thing: I have the highest respect for the Norwegian royal family: They are not like the other royals we read about. Yet, I cannot help but feel that monarchy, albeit only in name, has no place in modern democracy. Monarchs in Europe do little except live lavishly on taxpayers money.

There are people in Norway who are poor: The state, in a bid to save in budgets, often cut down on the benefits to weaker groups in the society, like the elderly and the youth. The recent budget cut on the elderly where they are no longer entitled to a certain benefit( (resulting in their economy being worse off than before) is one such example. Yet many Norwegians, who seems to frown upon giving benefits to those who are sick and disabled, have no qualms about the royal family spending millions on weddings and maintaining their expensive lifestyle.

Many argue that they represent their countries abroad and are the national pride. Well, we have diplomats and museums to fulfill that role.
I have personally met the Prince and he is fine man, no doubt but it doesn't change the fact that I do not support monarchy.

So you guessed right: I skipped watching the wedding.

Joke of the day

2010-06-17T01:43:00.000-07:00

My Iranian friend calls me up sometimes to share a joke. I heard one that was very funny so I decided to share with my blog buddies. No offence meant to anyone here.

The US Congress was trying to figure out ways to start the Third World War.
" Lets kill 14 million muslims" suggested George Bush.
" And lets' also kill Angelina Jolie!" said president Obama.

A shocked silence fell in Congress. Then all the congressmen started talking at once. " Why? Why should we kill Angelina Jolie? What has she done? Are you out of your mind???"

PS: Nobody reacted at the thought of killing 14 million muslims.

Rajneeti- a must watch

2010-06-13T03:02:00.000-07:00

I am usually patient but the songs and the reviews drove me to do something I often don't do- I watched Rajneeti ( which means politics) last night...a bad print. But I couldn't tear myself away from the film, despite the dark print. Yes, the rave reviews are right: the film is really good.
The story, based on the epic Mahabharta is indeed gripping. And not to mention the acting! Ranbir Kapoor stole the show in my opinion. I keep saying I am not a fan of Ranbir Kapoor but if he keeps acting like this I will join the ranks of his long list of fans. For me the surprise was Arjun Rampal, who acts well as the older brother of Ranbir.Arjun Rampal usually looks glamorous and handsome in films but in Rajneeti he actually gives a great performance! I liked him in Rock On but Rajneeti is his best role so far. Its award time for mr. Rampal, I bet! And a well deserved one.

Prakash Jha has always made great political thrillers. He is a director who doesn't wait for his audience to catch on...you need to hang in there, coz Jha won't serve you everything on a platter. I loved Apharhan as well but Rajneeti touches a chord. The junta that is disillusioned with the dirty politics gets a deep satisfaction in confirming its belief that the wily Indian politicians would go to any lengths to get a seat in the parliament.
The film is a mixture of Mahabharata, God Father but it also reminds of Sonia Gandhi. All in all, Prakash Jha succeeded in making a political thriller that is convincing. Both Prithvi( Arjun Rampal) and Samar Pratap ( Ranbir Kapoor) resort to dirty games to get what they want, the seat of Chief Minister. The heroes are no better than the villains when it comes to being ruthless,conniving and unscrupluous. What matters is winning. Do watch the film, its a must watch. I am going to watch it again just to watch the expressions of all the actors, specially Nana Patekar and Manoj Bajpai who are a treat for all movie goers who like good acting.
The only criticism I can come up with is that all these politicians kill people at a drop of a hat and get away with it. Is it really that easy? I mean Arjun Rampal bats a policeman to death, and there are no enquiries? Ranbir Kapoor plants bombs and kills ruthlessly, yet no body sends CBI over? But maybe in rural areas such things are more common.
And last but not least, the song Mora Piya is just excellent.

Raag Bhairvi

2010-06-11T09:30:00.001-07:00

One of my favourite pastimes is to listen to new songs on You Tube, specially new Bollywood hits. I heard the songs from the new hindi film " Rajneeti" which I read opened to packed houses in India. Due to a stubborn viral flu, I missed watching the film in the theaters here and today it is no longer playing on Eldorado so now I have to wait for the DVD.

But I was listening to the songs and was simply bowled over by the song " Ishq Barse". What I love is the intermittent classical chords in this song. The song is in Raga Bahiravi, one of the most popular Ragas, since it has all the elements of the Indian classical music. And it lifts the song really up, an excellent mix of modern music and Indian classic music.
Bhairavi has been cultivated extravagantly by the Hindi film music composers. Many of the lasting creations of the 20th C have their roots in this Raga. The distinction between 'light' and 'classical' is largely moot in the case of Bhairavi since a good Bhairavi rendition is seen as "Bhairavi" without regard to genre or source. Indeed the greatest Bhairavi on record issued not under the auspices of the Classical world but through the artistry of a musical genius firmly wedded to the popular imagination.

Remember music composed by the old duo Shankar- Jaikishen? They composed many classical based hit songs. Infact they ruled the Hindi film industry as the undisputed music composers from the 50's til 70's. In Barsaat, ( the old classical Bollywood hit from 1949, starring Raj Kapoor- Nargis that brought the music duo enormous fame) most of the songs were based on raga Bhairavi. In fact, Bhairavi is the most favorite raga of Shankar-Jaikishen.

Here is the song from Rajneeti that has taken me by storm. Don't miss the sound of thunder and rainfall that make it even more appropriate on this grey day here in Oslo. As the rain pours outside am enjoying this song in raag Bhairvi:

Eternal youth

2010-06-06T06:04:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was at the birthday of a friend.. She is over fifty and doesn't look a day over thirty five. I remember I had bumped into her a couple of years ago, I hadn't seen her for a while and I was struck by her youthful looks. So I asked her if she was using some skin product that has helped.

" It's botox, dear" She told me openly. Yesterday I noticed her upper lip looking fuller than usual and finally asked me what I thought of her new lip jobb. Well, it did sort of look sexy with a pout.

Today in the tram I bumped into the mother of a friend I used to hang out with some years back. I almost went past her because the woman had grown younger by twenty years!! I couldn't help staring at her wrinkle free face, a few wrinkles around the eyes sure but that's it. She looked really good! She is pushing sixty am sure but didnt look a day above 40. She was a raving beauty in her time.
Last week I had bumped into another old friend who turned fifty and imagine my shock when I saw her looking younger too!! What is happening I wondered..have people discovered an eternal fountain of youth?
I thought botox was something only the film stars used. But to my utter surprise, I found out it is becoming more and more common to use botox or other plastic surgeries. Young women save up to get silicone boobs. Botox clinics have not been affected by the financial crisis. Botox has come to stay. In Norway the Botox clinics are doing good business. I read also that 25 year old young people are also using botox to stave off the onset of age.

Ok nobody wants to get older and everyone wants to cling to their youthful looks but am thinking, what about side effects? I think this hysteria to look young is getting over hand. Even in movies, you barely see the age difference now between mother and daughter. Whatever happened to growing old gracefully? Or is Botox the fountain of eternal youth that human beings have been searching for ?

Have a good laugh!

2010-06-05T09:01:00.000-07:00

I received this on my email. It was so funny, I decided to post it:

7 Engineers and 7 Doctors are going from PUNE to Mumbai. So both groups gather at Pune Station.
Both groups are desperately trying to prove their superiority .
SCENE 1 (PUNE- MUMBAI):
------------ --------- --------- -------- ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- - -
7 engineers take only 1 Ticket and 7 doctors buy all 7 tickets..
Doctors are desperately waiting for TC to come......
When TC arrives,
All 7 Engineers get in one toilet so when TC knocks, one hand come out with the ticket and the TC goes

Away.....

NOW on return Journey All of them don't get a direct Train to PUNE. So they all decide to take a Passenger till Lonavala, from there they can easily get a LOCAL to PUNE

SCENE 2 (MUMBAI - LONAVALA):
------------ --------- --------- ---- ------------ --------- --------- ------------ - -----------
Doctors decided, "this time we will prove that we too are equal"....All 7 Doctors take 1 Ticket Engineers don't buy any ticket at all!!!!!..

TC arrives....

ALL DOCTORS IN ONE TOILET.ALL ENGINEERS IN THE OPPOSITE.

One engineer gets out and knocks the door of Doctors toilet, One hand comes with the tickets, he takes the
ticket and comes in Engg. Bathroo! m... TC DRIVES out ALL the doctors from the toilet and they areheavily fined.

SCENE 3 ( LONAVALA): !
------------ --------- --------- --------- --
SO now both the group r on LONAVALA station. Doctors planning their move for last chance, they board the local to Pune.

This time doctors decide that they will play the same (1 ticket) trick.

ALL Doctors take 1 tickets...Engineers BUY all 7 tickets this time...
SO TC Comes.. All Engineers showed their tickets ............ ....... .....

Doctors are still searching for toilet in the LOCAL train....... ....

Conclusion: Technically intelligent people are geniuses, don't mess with Engineers.

Candy sweet Lena

2010-05-30T02:40:00.000-07:00

Last night was the final Eurovision Song Contest and Germany won.
A friend of mine came over with a bottle of wine and her soon to be a teenage daughter who is half German. It was real fun. Eurovision is really big here. I saw people in town walking around with the Norwegian flag in hand, in case Didrik from Norway won. I knew it would be hard even though his song gives me goosebumps coz he has an amazing voice and I love it when he hits the high note. But it was Lena Meyer from Germany who walked away with victory. I think it wasn't just the song. The girl is so sweet and likable that you can't help but like her. I voted for her, among others.
Lena Meyers song "Satelite" got the maximum votes. It is light and breezy and the lyrics aren't much to boast about but it is catchy and humable. I am sad Turkey didn't win coz they were pretty good. They were my favourite.
Here is the winner song enjoy!

Voe, Facebook and stuff

2010-05-29T04:45:00.000-07:00

Voe. Yep, that is the name of the most popular blog in Norway. It was crowned as number one by VG, one of the biggest newspapers here.

Voe is written by a 14 year girl who writes what she is doing everyday. Now, out of curiosity I clicked in there and couldn't help but feel like a dinosaur...I had ventured into a strange territory. A place my son would probably enjoy more in a couple of years. Well Voe is very pretty and looks like a blond angel, so obviously it is no surprise that her blog gets 70 000 hits everyday. I don't want to sound sour grapes but I was thinking...is there any point in writing intelligent posts when such teeny bopper stuff is what makes a blog popular? Maybe we oldies are misfits on the social medias. I have seen som 50 and 60 somethings stumbling around on Facebook, trying to figure out stuff. Just yesterday a lady I know who is in her late fifties and also has a Facebook account, called me in sheer frustration.
" I don't know what am doing on FB!" she moaned in despair " I am so lost! I can't seem to find my friends...and I don't know how to get the latest news...and then there is Farmville. I was happier before I ventured into the web world. " I couldn't help laughing.

Of course it feels great if your blog gets so many hits but I still like blogs where the content interests me more. I also think that it is good for the young people to write blogs. After all it takes a certain creativity to keep a blog. And of course if I was a teenager...I would definitely want to read Voes blog.

Eurovision 2010- part 2

2010-05-28T00:53:00.000-07:00

Ok, as you can guess I have got the Eurovison fever! I watched the second round of semi finals where 10 countries went on to the finals. Tomorrow is D Day when the winner song will be voted. By now my list of favourites is growing and I am already planning on so many I will vote for! yesterday the songs I liked the best were from Georgia and Turkey but my son made me vote for Armenia too!! The excitement is building up. I must add here that our two ladies, Haddy N'Ji and Nadia Hassanoui and Erik who are hosting the show simply glow on stage: NRK could not have chosen three more well deserving hosts. Here are the two songs we( me and my son) voted for yesterday:

Here is the song entry by Turkey:

Here is the song entry by Armenia:

Eurovision 2010

2010-05-26T10:30:00.000-07:00

This weekend is Eurovision song contest. Since Norway won it last year it is being hosted in Oslo. I watched the semifinals yesterday and liked the song by Moldova. I have been to the finals in Norway where Didrik Solli Tangen who is Norways hope this year won the national competition. He does have a great voice and gives a superb rendition of the song" My heart is yours" though I still thinkAlexander Rybak's song last year was far out. It will be an expensive victory for Norway if Didrik wins it this year. The national broadcasting network has used a lot of money on hosting the Eurovision and will not be too happy to spend moe money next year. But I do think Didirik is a strong contender.

I also like the song entry from Moldova. And I can't help thinking that their song is a bit inspired by Alexander Rybak, who played the violin last year to the song " Fairytale". Check it out:

Fergie in troubled waters

2010-05-24T13:49:00.000-07:00

The news of the ex- duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson has hit the tabloids. She was filmed accepting 40.000 dollars in pay offs from an undercover reporter, posing as a rich businessman. A humiliated Fergie blames it on poverty. The tabloids are full of the news and are criticising her, yet I can't help feeling sorry for her. And most of all I am furious at the journalists for exploiting her situation to come up with a sensational story. It reminds of a similar story when a British undercover reporter had approached the father of the young star who played the role of Latika as a child, Rubaina, and had offered him money for his daughter.
Again the newspaper exploited the weakness of a poor person, desperate to get out the situation.

Ethically, what Fergie did was obviously wrong but what about the ethics of the journalist? I am appalled that the newspaper would stoop so low to get a scoop.
I am also disappointed in the royal family of Britain. Ok, maybe Fergie is not their favourite person and may have caused them embarrassment but it still doesn't change the fact that she is the mother of two princesses. They should have given her something. Princess Diana got 20 millions but Fergie got nothing.

I feel sorry for her. But she is not the first woman to have become poor after a divorce. I think it is unfair to judge her.

Summer

2010-05-22T07:32:00.000-07:00

Summer is finally here in Oslo. Yesterday we had a barbeque in the park with some colleagues. Later some of them came over to my place and we had chai. My chai is quite famous among peopl who know me here. I make real punjabi chai with lots of milk and sugar. Even the children of my Norwegian friends ask for my chai when they come over. And at the risk of sounding conceited, I do believe my home made chai beats the cafe lattes you get in most coffee shops here.
Anyway, I have not been able to update my blog regularly as I did last year. My work is consuming too much of my time. Then there are other challenges too.
When you work a lot, you don't socialise much and that leads to isolation if that continues for a long time and can even lead to burn out. Anyway, I am back now and will write posts and visit your blogs often.

Games people play

2010-05-21T00:05:00.000-07:00

Relationships aren't easy- I have learned that. But we need to relate to people, not just in our personal lives but also at work place and socially. There is no escape. Yet, it isn't easy. Whether one is attending a school function or in the office or even friendships.
Earlier I had lots and lots of friends but it was mostly because I just put up with a lot of stuff. I got along with anyone because I never "made a fuss". Even when these people stepped on boundaries and behaved badly. But ultimately it doesn't go far...for a relationship to function people have to have a certain respect for boundaries and certain unspoken rules have to be followed. For example, you cannot expect someone to put up with your rude comments forever or bad behaviour like throwing tantrums at a drop of a hat. There comes a point when nobody wants to put up with it.
Yet, I have often seen how manipulations work and people actually get away with it. People play games and nobody gets it.

I wonder how many have experienced this? There is one person in school, college, at work or among a group of friends. He or she is nice to everyone else ,charming and with butter- wouldn't - melt- in - my- mouth attitude but towards you this person shows this side of being mean and manipulative. And you are the only one that sees it coz you are not buying the fake stuff. What should you do? You obviously cannot talk it over with others coz they see him or her as differently( remember the butter?).
It is difficult to relate to such a person who has a chameleon like personality that changes colours.
They even make you doubt your own judgement and you wonder" is it me? Am I the one who is unreasonable?"

They are so clever in throwing back such stuff at you that they have the ability to even make you question your own abilities.
So how do I deal with them?
I ignore them, freeze them out. But sometimes it is really hard. But I am a very strong person and when they make me start doubting myself and my reaction, I remind myself of "facts" not feelings or vibes. Facts of events that have actually happened. That removes doubt and makes me regain my footing and know that once again I am dealing with a sly person playing games. Just don't play.

A nights experience

2010-05-08T13:19:00.000-07:00

Last night I watched a documentary outdoors. It was the Deichmansk library that had arranged the outdoor cinema. So it was kind of cool to sit on the chairs, tucked in blankets, with our drinks and goodies all around, having a night time picnic. I met up with an friend that I hadn't seen for a while. She is a very intense lady but very intelligent.

The documentary was excellent, called " Space tourists" by Christian Frie. It was about an Iranian- American woman who had a dream of travelling in space. She pays 20 million dollars to a Russian spaceship so that she gets to spend 8 days in space. She also wants to make space tourism available to more and more people.
When it started I whispered to my friend" Don't tell me am here to watch a rich diva fulfill her dream of space in travelling??"
But it wasn't just about her. The director managed to capture the contrasts between the two worlds, the earth and the space. The rich woman who gets her dreams fulfilled and the Russian metal pickers who collect the remains of the destroyed spaceship to use it or sell it to China.
The music by the famous Norwegian musician Jan Garbarek was perfect. I loved it , even though it was 98 minutes long.
When it was over, we sat and talked and it was sort of surreal sitting there in the middle of town as people passed by. But it was a nice experience.

Here is Jan Garbareks music. If you like jazz you will like his music. I am a huge fan.

Machismo

2010-04-28T23:50:00.000-07:00

I am beginning to grow an allergy to Latino men.Yes, yes, I know not everyone is alike but my encounter with them ( purely on a professional basis and more shall it never be, I guarantee thee as my prejudice is speedily growing!)
The term "machismo " or "macho" is often used to describe Latino men.
When I was a teenager I devoured Mills and Boons books. It was the first time I came across the term "machismo". It sounded so glamourous and heck, what did I know...all of 16 and with starry dreams?
In the books the hero is a macho guy and the heroine, timid and shy. He acts like an arrogant bully and he always wins ( the first kiss is always thrust upon our poor unsuspecting heroine and she promptly falls in love with the bully after that).
But in real life Latin men can be aggressive, self opinionated and stubborn as a mule!
Today a young male Latino came over to the office for the first time. Like most Latinos he was short, but his demeanour was six feet tall and very very macho. I cringed inwards. When the other guy asked me what was my first impression, I hesitated at first but never one to mince words, out came the words" typical macho!"
He burst out laughing because he is one too!!

Trondheim

2010-04-19T00:50:00.000-07:00

This weekend I was in Trondheim. I was so looking forward to travelling to Trondheim when the volcano in Iceland stopped all air traffic in Europe. So I ended up on the night train from Oslo to Trondheim. An eight hour torture. I didn't get a sleeper because all those cancelled flights had everyone rushing to reserve train or bus seats.
When I reached Trondheim on Friday early morning I realised I had bones in my body that I wasn't aware existed. Now they screamed at me in pain. But that wasn't all. I had trouble sleeping all night coz I was so afraid somebody was going to tap me on my shoulder and say" ma' am you are snoring too loudly" so I was too tensed to sleep properly. Besides, some young people on the train had decided to make the journey a gossip train and chattered all night. But I did doze off in between. In my sleep I dreamt my bed was flying around and making an awful chug chug noise.

When I asked a person for the direction to the hotel, I was painfully reminded of my being of foreign origins...I had problem understanding the Trønder dialect.
The conference was superb but socialising wasn't easy. I was surrounded by journalists and editors from all over Norway, who were running small regional newspapers. And garrulous me had problems having conversations...so many different dialects...my mind was boggling. Thank God many of the lectures were in Oslo dialect so I understood everything.

Other than that, I liked the place a lot. I visited the famous Niodaros Cathedral that was just beautiful. I took these pictures with my mobile.

Match Point

2010-04-05T02:47:00.000-07:00

As I wrote in my previous post, I have been watching a lot of movies during the Easter break and one movie which I watched on the national channel NRK 3 has made such an impression that I am forced to blog about it.

In all literature and also in life, there is often poetic justice and when a film shows the opposite it upsets me no end.
The film am talking about is called " Match Point" written and directed by Woody Allen. It is a very good film and I recommend it even though the end of the story upset me a lot and I have been thinking of it since I watched it on Friday.

The story goes like this:
The Irish former professional player Chris Wilton( Jonathan Rhys Meyer) from the lower class gets a job as tennis instructor in an upper class club in London. Chris becomes close to his student Tom Hewett, who introduces him to his British upper class family, and Tom's sister Chloe immediately falls in love with him. The ambitious Chris keeps the relationship with Chloe, feeling lust for Tom's fiancée, the American aspirant actress Nola Rice( Scarlett Johansson), and they have a brief affair. Chris gets married to Chloe and climbs to a high position in a company of the Hewett's family, while Tom breaks his engagement with Nola. When Chris meets Nola by chance, he becomes obsessed for her and she becomes his mistress. When Nola gets pregnant and presses him, he balances the financial advantages of his marriage but he has to take a decision in his life and choose the woman he wants for his companion.

It is a typical love triangle and has all the ingredients of a Woody Allen film like passion, temptation and lust.
Yet, I don't know if there was poetic justice in the film. Chris transforms into a lying cheating conniving psychopath from a man driven by uncontrollable passion. His slow transformation and the point of no return he reaches are the high point of the film. It keeps you glued to the screen.

Scarlett Johansson is excellent as the sexy, voluptuous and temperamental actress. Yet the film left me sad. It is often like that in life isn't it? People get away with bad things. They lie, cheat and connive and nothing happens to them. But the last scene where Chris' face is shown and the expression he had , maybe that was the poetic justice. That he has to live with the thought of what he did the rest of his life. Yet to me it didn't seem like that was enough.

Do watch the film if you get a chance. It is very good.

Happy Easter

2010-03-31T06:04:00.000-07:00

Twice a year the whole of Norway comes to a standtstill. During Christmas and Easter. Surprising, from a country that has probably the largest number of athiests. Yet, Norway is a Christain state and it is never more evident as during these two holy holidays.
When I say that Norway comes to a standstill, I mean mostly that Norwegians are the ones who disappear from Oslo. They go skiing up in the mountains or travel abroad for a break. So Oslo looks deserted except for the foreigners, who become really visible during the easter.
Earlier I used to stock up my refrigerator with food supplies because all the shops close. Until I discovered the corner store run by a Pakistani family and a little further away, another store run by a Vietnamese family. They are always open: So now I just relax and am so glad that I escape the stress of buying loads of milk and bread and don't have to carry all those bags either. I relax even during these days when the country comes to a standstill.
I thought I was going to blog but I have been lured by the films on TV and the book I started during Christmas but never had time to read it.

Anyway. I hope all of you are having a great Easter!

Cheeky people

2010-03-19T13:44:00.000-07:00

Some people just shoot their mouths off. They just say things without thinking over what they are saying and sometimes end up really annoying or hurting the sentiments of others.Then there are those who pride in being " direct " and brutally honest ...at the the expense of others.
My aunt is one lady who steps on a lot of toes and annoy people with her tactless comments.
Like there is a relative and I hadn't met their son. The last time I had seen him he was just five. So I asked if he had grown into a good looking boy.
My aunt pursed her lips and out came the comment:
" Humph! He's got boobs like a teenage girl!!"
Needles to say I went into paroxysm of laughter( In Punjabi it sounded extremely funny).

My aunt rubs a lot of people the wrong way with her outspokeness.

Recently a friend of mine got very upset with me at a party where I made a joke. The words just slipped out of my mouth before I could stop them. Anyway, she is like my aunt and has made lots of lots of crass remarks to me, which I have brushed aside.
But the next day, she came over to my place and in true Punjabi style wanted to have a huge fight.
Earlier I used to just shrug and not reply back but that day I got really pissed and we ended up in a huge argument. I reminded her of the countless remarks she has made and then she should also be able to take a joke( ok, maybe it was an insensitive joke).

But I find myself being more and more cheeky towards her lately. Obviously, the cup has renneth over...

How come people who are always making rude comments( which they call honesty) cannot take the same honesty dished out to them?

This particular friend has made remarks for many years that have annoyed me. Many others have also reacted to her.
Maybe I was wrong but I felt that a cheeky person should also earn to handle cheeky remarks if they are made at their expense.

But most of all I am annoyed at myself for being thus provoked and stooping to her level.

Truth is strange

2010-03-13T04:58:00.000-08:00

I just read about an old woman who killed her husband and it reminded me of another story.

This is a true story:
The lady was married to a man 20 years her senior many many years ago. She was a stay home mommy, raised three kids and put up with a husband who was demanding, rude and treated her like she was dirt on earth. He shouted at her if dinner was served 10 minutes late. He yelled at her if the soup was not hot enough. He screamed if she forgot to iron his shirts.
If she asked him to buy her flowers or something nice he snarled at her that he was not going to spend his hard earned money on such frivolous things. And he threw that a lot in her face that she had it easy: a cushy life because he had a good job.
She put up with the bad tempered man for the childrens sake.
Years rolled by. The kids grew up and moved out.
Now it was just the two of them in the house. By now the man had retired. Earlier he was atleast away during the day. Now he was there all the time. So he found even more faults in her. He shouted even more.
She put up with it. Over the years she had learned to ignore a lot of things. She had learned th art of letting it all fall off her like water off a ducks back.

The old man was miserable. One day he told her:
" I want a divorce."
"Why?" She asked him.
"You are impossible to live with!!" He yelled.
She was 67 years old and he was 87 years old.
Their children were aghast. " Are you out of your mind? " they told their father. They all knew it was he who was the difficult one." You are getting on in years and mother will look after you in your old age, why do you want to divorce her?"
" No, I cannot live with her "The old man was adamant.
Then the woman said she was fine with it.
They got divorced and she got half of everything they owned.
Suddenly she discovered that a whole new world had opened up for her. For nearly fifty years she had only served her husband. Now suddenly she was on her own.
She went on a cruise holiday, something she never did before. She joined a dance club for senior citizens and made new friends. She went to museums on her.

To her amazement she discovered that for the first time she was happy. She woke up when she wanted to, did what she felt like.
" If I had known this I would have divorced him years ago!" she told her children.

So how did it go with the cranky old man?
He was moved to an old people home, because his health was failing and none of their children wanted to put up with his bad moods and shouting. The health workers in the Old peoples home have named him the "crazy old man".

International Womens Day

2010-03-08T09:40:00.000-08:00

Gender equality.
I believe that this is the last bastion in the history of civilisation that remains to be conquered. Though there is much to be achieved in the fight for equal rights for different groups of the societies in the world, yet gender equality is one battle that is far from achieved. Even in a developed country like Norway where women are more equal than other places in the world, full gender equality is not yet achieved though many people seem to think so.
There are few women on the top. More women who work part time and are stay home mommy. Yes, in the developed world too.
I don't think there is anything wrong in being a stay home mommy, yet women lose out on pension points and career opportunities because despite benefits for mothers, it is still not easy to combine a demanding job and be a mommy. I met two friends this weekend for coffee and both are now working 50 % because they are tired. With two boys under the age of ten, they are quite exhausted.

In India too, working women have it tougher. A close freind of mine the vice president of her company and has two maids and a driver etc but tells me that she is still the one who sits with her son to do his home work with him.
But if womens fight for equal rights was only about these issues, I would call it a luxury.
Today there are brutalities committed on women all over the world, in the name of love, marriage and honour. In Spain a woman is killed almost every day by a jealous and violent husband or lover. In Norway the statistics for violence against women are scarily high.Infact our Foreign Minister Jonas Gahr Støre, had to answer The United Nations on why the statistics of domestic violence are so high in December last year. According to Battered womens shelter there are more and more women seeking shelter now than ever, from violent and angry men. Last month alone, two young women have been brutally murdered by jealous men.

But in countries like India, the girl child is fighting a new battle: the battle to exist. The alarming rate of female feotus that are being aborted in India is a shame for all Indians.
In the old days, they buried her alive. Now they simply abort her away.
And yet on the other hand the Rajya Sabha passes the bill for 33 percent reservations for women in the Parliament and Assemblies in India. So we have come far but the battle is far from over.
As long as injustices on women prevail in the society, the fight for equal rights is not over. We need to pass the torch on...Happy Womens day!

Women are from Venus

2010-02-20T01:07:00.001-08:00

Yesterday after work, we gathered at a Ivars Kro, a local pub in Grønland( I truly am falling in love with Grønland...totally and unconditionally!) The guys started the topic of women.

" I don't understand women" says my boss, who is gay.
The other guys nodded sagely and agreed. " Yes, they are so difficult to understand!"
So it was upto me and my other colleague to solve the mystery for them.
"What's so hard to understand?"I asked them.
So my boss tells us that most gay men get along fabuously with women and have loads of girlfriends but he doesn't and he cannot fathom why...?
Recently two or three women whom he thought were his friends had deleted him from his friends list on Facebook and he had no clue what he had done. So he even sent them mails asking if everything was ok...and naturally, he never heard from them.
" Why did they do it?"
" Some women are just mean...downright mean!" I told him and advised him to ignore them. And if some woman has deleted you from her friends list...NEVER EVER contact her!!
Because once a woman goes cold turkey, she is cold forever.
It is usually the man who always tries to repair a broken friendship or marriage but women once they give up, they seldom turn back.
And yes there is something about my boss that doesn't elicit the same kind of closeness I share with another gay colleague.
I get along with my boss and we have mutual respect for each other but no, am not buddy- buddy with him, like I am with the other gay guy, who does the graphic designing. Him and I get along like a house on fire! When I started working there, he was the first person I got along with I felt that I may have met the only man in the universe who understands me so well!!!
All the other girls in our staff adore him too. Which makes the other straight males in the staff slightly envious...but the truth is this guy is so open, sympathetic and understands the emotions of a woman so well, so naturally we flock to him about advice on men and other issues.

I think my boss is a typical man, even though he is gay. He is reserved and doesn't easily share his emotions. And we women, we like all emotions hanging out!!
And yet if a man is too friendly and open, he elicits a contemptuous response from most females, who treat him like crap. Like one young guy, who has loads of great looking female friends but he is clearly in the " friend zone". so one day I asked him,
" So tell me, do they confide in you about all the problems with boy friends, love troubles etc.? "
He nodded.
" But none of them is interested in you, right? You are their best buddy forever!"
He nodded again.
Most of his female friends are great looking gals and he is probably lying awake at night and wondering when will they realise he is the dream guy. Well, the sad part is : they never will.

I wanted to tell him that he needs to stop being so gallant and nice.
Which is really a contradiction but aren't we women horrible to nice men? If you look back then there is atleast one nice man most of us have been mean to.
So the thing is one has to strike the right balance: if you are too nice, you are brushed off as a wimp or a push over, if you are too mean you are given up totally upon.
Then I asked them( the guys) why is that when you ignore a guy he will send you sms, call you and send you mails but the moment you show feelings, he disappears like thin air!!
One young male colleague said that girls are more fun as long as they are hard to get.
So is it all about these games?
Anyway, It was an interesting discussion and really, I don't have the perfect reply. Maybe it is true that women are from Venus and men are from Mars. I maybe older but am nonetheless wiser....

My name is Khan

2010-02-18T12:38:00.000-08:00

I just got back from the theaters, after watching My name is Khan.
So where do I start...the good stuff or the bad stuff?? Ok, let me go with the good stuff first.
This is a Shahrukh Khan (SRK) film all the way. And he doesn't disappoint. Not once does he go over the top or slips up as Rizwan Khan a man with Aspergers Syndrome who kan only understand things in a simple way. Loud sounds and unfamiliar places scare him. SRK proves that he is a thorough professional. His tendency to overact or over dramatise in some of his earlier block busters is nowhere to be found in MNIK. And unlike in Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi where he dominated the screen in each and every scene, he is not to be found in each and every frame of the film.
The story is actually quite nice and has some hilarious moments.
Rizwan Khan as mentioned earlier is man with a psychological impairment. He has the Aspergers syndrome. He cannot express his emotions easily, and has limited social skills. ( People with this diagnosis usually lack empathy)
After his mother dies, he moves to San Francisco to live with his younger brother, Zakir.
He meets a bubbly hair dresser, Mandira Rathore( Kajol) and falls in love with her
"They say that certain peoples laughter releases a chemical reaction in your brain" is his scientific way of explaining that he has fallen in love with her.
Manidra is a single mother and has a son called Sameer.
After the initial hiccups, Rizwan and Mandira get married. Then 11 September changes their lives in a dramatic way. Tragedy strikes and Mandira blames it on Rizwan, for being a muslim. She tells him to leave and taunts him to go tell the president of America that he is not a terrorist. The simples soul that Rizwan is, he sets out to do just that.

Up until this point, the film is simply great. You laugh, you cry with Rizwan and Mandira. But after this point, cliches after cliches follow. Rizwan is taken in by FBI as a terror suspect, then he lands up Georgia and then, the hurricane in Georgia and he goes to save mama Jenny. By then I was squirming in my seat out of sheer embarrassment...totally unnecessary.
But when he meets president elect Barack Obama, I coudn't control my laughter anymore!!! This was cheesy Bollywood. Come on Karan Johar...you had a good thing going ...why did you go overboard with sheer exaggeration?
Another thing was the length of the film. It is way too long. KJ= could easily have edited the part where Rizwan goes to Georgia and helps mama Jenny. The Obama part( though the guy who played Obama was a feast for the eyes...simply gorgeous!!)could also have been edited and not missed at all.
Kajol is lovely as usual and though she matched Aamir word for word in Fanaa, she couldn't hol dher fort against a brilliant SRK. He outshines her here. And no am not some star struck fan speaking. I am quite neutral to SRK. I used to like him a lot before he got big and started overacting like crazy.

Anyway, with all the hype and MINK being a super duper hit, I don't regret having gone to see it but my frank opinion is that Bollywood should seriously lay off the subjcet of terrorism. They botch it up completely. And next time, stick to the usual formula, KJO!

Athesim versus religious belief

2010-02-14T02:30:00.000-08:00

Photo: Ola Gjethammer

I am not religious and if I was to go into pedagogical definition of a hindu, I am not really a good hindu( I eat beef, never go to a temple, don't say my prayers)but I am not an athiest. I do believe in God, or rather an omnipresence of a spiritual power. So once in a while I think over the existential questions like: is there really heaven and hell?
And if so, is it true that we will be sorted out according to our sins and good deeds and sent off to either one of those places after death?

Here in Norway, a lot of people are atheists, they don't believe in God. Yet many of them are better human beings than many religious people I have met in my life.
However I wonder if this growing intolerance towards religious belief, esp towards islam is a kind of a struggle between non- believers and believers?
On friday and saturday there were demonstrations in central Oslo where around 3000 mulsims gathered to protest against the caricature of prophet Muhammed in two big newspapers, Aftenposten and Dagbladet.
It is very difficult for Norwegians to understand how sacrosanct prophet Muhammed is to muslims and I wonder if that comes from a the fact that many do not believe in a God at all.
I was once working in student organisation and one day I found out that a guy who works there is a satanist. I was really shocked and I felt a huge unease around him after that. A colleague there told me one day" I think you should respect the fact that he has a total and opposite belief than yours."

So I am thinking, how come on one hand, I am asked to respect a satanist and on the other, accept this growing intolerance towards islam here?
Something doesn't quite gel here.

I don't have the answers but I am just wondering: this is one thing a lot of hindus also feel, that muslims have a very strong faith. Why is that seen as a fault? Why does it scare the majority of Norwegians?
A friend of mine , who is muslim , once told me" Saroj, you are quite secure about your religion. " And I think that is true, I am, so as long as I am sure and secure in my own values, it doesn't threaten or scare me that someone else has a stronger or a weaker belief than mine. I don't know where this Norwegian insecurity is coming from?
They have a great country, is time and again declared as the the best country to live in by the United Nations, why this insecurity?
Is it because being athiests, it scares them that someone has a belief they cannot relate to ?

Just my musings on a sunday afternoon. I don't have the answers, just a lot of questions

Oscar nominated films

2010-02-07T03:17:00.001-08:00

Every year around this time, I wait patiently for the Oscars. Last year I was very sure "Slumdog Millionaire" will win the Oscar for best film.I had seen it much before it's official release, thanks to a website a friend of mine uses to download films.
This year, it's much harder to guess but I think the race is between " Avatar" and " The hurt locker". I really can't say though my guess is it will be "Avatar".
I have seen the film twice in the theater and it is a film I don't mind seeing again.I loved it. I know James Cameron chose cliches to get his point across but it worked for me.

I just watched " Julie & Julia", starring Meryl Streep, who is nominated in the category of best actress. She is excellent in the role of Julia Child. But when does Meryl Streep let her audience down? My bet is, she will win it. Though I must admit I haven't watched all the other films, except Sandra Bullock in " The blind side". She is very good in her role and the film is very good too.
I have also watched " Precious", and though the film is powerful, it broke my heart and I had trouble watching it to the end. It is just too depressing and sad but yes, a very good film. Gabourey Sidebe acts so convincingly, you want to weep for her, so she is absolutely a candidate but I don't think she will win it.

I just love Helen Mirren. Period. I haven't seen the film yet but am sure she is excellent in it.
But for all bloggers, Julie& Julia is worth watching. The film is sort of light and breezy and captures your attention. If you are a foodie and a blogger, this film is for you. So I highly recommend it!

Ignorance is bliss

2010-02-06T03:43:00.000-08:00

This happened on thursday on my way home from work. I was tired and hungry and just wanted to go home. But I had to do the groceries on the way. So I stopped by Rema ,did my hasty food shopping and stood in the line at the counter. Then this young Norwegian guy sort of just slowly edged his way forward. He wasn't carrying any groceries so I was fooled into thinking that he was just going to ask the woman at the counter a question. But suddenly he asked her for gillete razors!!He jumped the line! I watched in silent fury as he bought the blades and made his exit. And then influenced by the media which point out even a miniscule fault, if committed by a person of a foreign origin , I found myself fuming in anger!!
" How dare he!! He thinks he is better than us...he can go ahead of us( the others in line were dark skinned like me)just coz he is white!! Oh the racist bastard!! "

On my way home I calmed myself down and realised just how powerful the impact of media has upon us. No wonder some Norwegian people react so strongly to any negative coverage about "foreigners". They forget one thing like I did that day standing in line at the counter: Some people are assholes( pardon the language).

Not every issue is about culture and religion as the Norwegian press often portrays it and not every thing is about racism as many of us from other countries tend to believe.
It didn't matter whether the guy who jumped the queue was white, black, brown or yellow- he was just a jerk who didn't give damn about the rest of us who stood in line, patiently waiting for our turn. And there are many such people.
I was thinking later that maybe I should stop reading all these debates in the newspapers...all I want to be is a happy ignorant citizen again..

Taking on a bully

2010-01-25T14:05:00.000-08:00

It takes a lot of courage to stand up against a bully. But that is what I have decided to do. I won't write much about it at this point but will write a post about it later.
Bullies are everywhere. They are in the school play ground, at work places, in politics and sometimes even in your bedrooms.

For some reason I provoke bullies. Because I refuse to be treated badly. I stand up to bullies. But it is a battle where you use a two edged sword. It can also cut the one who uses it.
When I was 10 years old, there used to be bully in the building compound where we lived. A 12 year old Jordanian boy who was actually retarded. There were lots of kids who used to play in the compound gardens in the evenings but as soon as the bully appeared everyone would scatter out of fear. I used to be a skinny and tiny 10 year old and looked as though a gust of wind could blow me away.
But one day I took on that bully , who was a head taller than me and well built. He was almost as tall as my father.
We were playing and he showed up, asking rudely for all of us to leave. All the kids scuttled away but I refused and stood by the stairs. A hush fell upon the whole building porch, where we were playing hide and seek. The bully saw me and asked me why was I there. " Aren't you afraid of me?" he glared down at me.
I stuck out my chin and said" No".
Before I could blink he slapped me across my face, hard. I can still remember how my ear reverberated with the sound of the slap.
" Now? I bet you are scared now!" he gloated.
I jutted out my chin once more and said " No, I am not scared of you."
Another stinging slap followed. My friends watched in horrified silence as the bully kept slapping me, for each time I said no, I wasn't afraid of him. He must have slapped me atleast ten times but each time I stared squarely in his eyes and said I wasn't afraid of him.

Finally, he laughed and ran away. The guy had a mental problem, I heard later.
It was only after he left that I allowed the tears to roll down my cheeks.
My friends surrounded me as soon as he left and said" wow, you are brave!"
I became the hero among the kids!!
" There she is, who isn't afraid of the bully!"
The bully never bothered me again.

So wish me luck, am about to take on a bully again. But this serial bully is more dangerous. She is female and grown up. Not all battles end like with the Jordanian boy. But as Gautama Buddha said that the who one who bears an injustice in silence is just as responsible as the one who inflicts it.

The dream guy

2010-01-22T15:48:00.000-08:00

I have the coolest mom in the whole world sometimes. And a other times...well, let's leave that one. Anyway, I was talking to her on the phone and she said. "tu koi boyfriend dhoond le ...life will be easy".( Find yourself a boyfriend."

I couldn't help laughing!! If only my mother knew my online wooes of a few years back. I told her that no way am I going to find me an Asian dude who at the end of the day will expect me to make him loads of chappatis and khana on top of a busy day at work.

It's been so long since I have thought of what kind of person I like...but the guy in the pic is a good start..what do you think? Is he for real???

Grønland's Moral police

2010-01-14T14:13:00.000-08:00

A few days back, Aftenposten, one of the biggest newspaper in Norway, carried a story of how Grønland in east of Oslo has become more Moroccan than Morocco. My jaw dropped to the floor. Needless to say, I bought the paper and read the story with great interest. The reason? I work in Grønland and everyday I walk past the Somalian cafes, the samosa stalls and the underground tube station. If this moral police was patrolling, it sure made itself invisible to me. One guy from Iran said he was yelled at by other muslims when he bought a samosa during Ramadan. Oops, did the samosa guy think am Latin?? Coz believe me I devoured samosas, drank my lattes, ate my burgers all in my gluttony peace during ramadan...nobody bothered me.
Infact once I even went to the predominantly male Somalian cafe. I must confess though that a hush fell upon my arrival and one stared at me but not in a way that I would suspect him to be the moral police.
In the same story a Moroccan woman whom I actually know a bit through some friends( who are my good Moroccan friends) claimed that she felt bothered by the moral police who gave her dirty looks. I have often bumped into her in the Evita cafe, smoking and drinking as she pleases, and she never complained of being harassed. I called up my friend to ask her if this is true what she says and she was shocked by the article too, saying this woman is not credible.
Ok, Grønland has it's riff raffs I won't deny it but to say that it has become a den for the islamic moral police is a real exaggeration.
In todays papers onec could also read that Zahid Ali, who is a stand up comedian, has been threatened by older Pakistani men in Grønland. His crime? He made funny jokes about their culture etc.
Now I personally find Zahid quite funny but am not sure everyone shares his sense of humour. Still, death threats are not ok.
I spoke to some young women and sure enough they disclosed that some had been pinched on the butt or called a whore. But how many have experienced it is a bit unclear.

This kind of journalism( where you get three or four sources who speak against their own community) is very dangerous because later even if they find out that only a handful of idiots are behaving this way, pinching women and calling girls whores, the damage will be done forever.
But all said and done these are after all someobdys subjective experiences. It shouldn't be the basis of forming a collective impression of Grønland and other people who live there.

Kurbaan- Saifeena disappoint big time

2010-01-10T11:47:00.000-08:00

After having enjoyed Ajab Prem ki Gazab Kahani, I was in the mood for some more Bollywood so I watched Kurbaan last night.

Now, my good mood is spoiled.
To make a film about terrorists is a touchy subject and definitely not a topic that is easy for a film maker but that is exactly why it should be dealt with extra care. People didn't like Fanaa but I liked it because unlike Kurbaan it stayed true to the masala formula. Besides the a combination of Aamir and Kajol, two of the finest actors in the Hindi film industry, and great songs saved it from being a total drag.
But Kurbaan lacked all of that and attempts to take us into the heads of terrorists. It fails compeletly, if you ask me. There are so many indiscrepancies in the script that it fails to convince.
First of all, I think the combination of Saif and Kareena doesn't work. The fact that they are having a relationship in real life effected their reel life relationship. It seemed as is Saif and Kareena were there in the (in)famous lovemaking scene. Frankly it annoyed me. I felt I was made to peep in the bedroom of the two stars, something I would rather be spared. And Mind you, I am no prude( remember I was dying to watch Jism?)
Not even for a moment did it feel like it was Avantika and Ahsaan out there. And it annoyed me that they did it. Why did they have to put in all the details with Kareenas back and all that...and mind you, my objections are absolutely not on the same grounds as the conservatives who had sent Kareena sarees.
It was just unnecessary.
Then in the scene where Ahsan tells her in the subway while he has been shot at three times, that he never planned to fall in love with her, his face shows no signs of feelings. And no trace of pain after being shot at 2- 3 times...c'mon, even the worst of Bollywood films show the hero's face contorted in agony after being shot at ...Kia Saif super hero hai?( Is Saif a super hero?)
Then my second objection was when Vivek Oberoi, Saif and Om Puri are in the subway and they start shooting but the tube keeps on moving. How is that possible? I know that had such an incident occured, they would have stopped all traffic immediately and sent in a swat team.
My thirs objection is described by India. com perfectly:
And if that wasn't enough Saif's character goes ahead and stabs a man in a public bar! And all the while he walks about in the open NYC streets! Even as he is wanted by the FBI, who have a photograph of him! Have Karan Johar and D'Silva ever been to New York?
Post 9/11 even a brown skinned bearded dude is suspected of being Khalid Sheikh Mohammed's brother. And Saif's terrorist gang simply recruits Vivek Oberoi for the mission, without even doing a background check on the guy. Juvenile attempt at attention to detail, this. So true!!!
The story goes like this:
Avantika meets a glib romantic professor Ahsan in India while she is teaching there for a semester. They get married and move to New York, where she is from. They move in a neighbourhood where other Asians live. Soon Avantika gets to know that there is something strange about the neighbours who seem like a conservative muslim family.
She slowly also finds out that the man she married isn't really who he says he is...

Fine, all very fine: But my biggest problem was that I just didn't understand why did they all become terrorists? There are many people who have experienced exactly the same kind of tragedies they suffered but you don't become a terrorist because of that. It just didn't make sense to me( Please explain, someone, I may be the dense one here)

The only saving grace of the film was was Vivek Oberoi, who acts brilliantly and of course Om Puri, who looks every inch the cold fundamentalist he is supposed to be. It is a real pity that both Saif and Kareena failed to make an impact because both of them are very good actors. But they just couldn't pull a Saifeena on screen. They disappoint big time.
Still, the movie is a thriller and the climax has a few surpises.

Ajab Prem ki Gazab Kahani

2010-01-08T13:26:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I got the DVD for Ajab Prem ki Gazab Kahani. The first scene was so exaggerated that I was ready to switch it off but then the quick pace of the film captured my attention and Ranbir Kapoor, who absolutely isn't my favourite, actually made my laugh. The scene where he sees Katrina Kaif for the first time is just too hilarious. Then my son, who usually avoids Bollywood films joined me and before I knew it, we were laughing our heads off and actually enjoying it.
The story is simple:

Prem Shankar Sharma is a happy go lucky boy who runs a Happy Club. He is a high schooldrop out who does nothing much all day except play pranks with his freinds, much to the chagrin of his hard working father. Prem stammers when he gets upset. Then he meets Jenny and falls in love with her. But Jenny is a Christian and he is a Hindu, a pundit, a strict vegetarian. Prem does a lot of things to impress Jenny and the scene where he goes to work for the first time is one of my favourite.

After the interval the film drags a bit. The part where Upen Patel shows up is a bit of drag but the film is still entertaining and keeps you laughing.

It is a fun film to be watched with the whole family and the songs are simply beautiful.
Ranbir is being touted as the next superstar in Bollywood and the guy sure can act. Though he is not my type at all, I could finally understand why the teeny boppers adore him. He has a refreshing boyish charm and for once a young man playing the role of a young man is actually in his twenties and not a Shahrukh, Salman and Aamir who play college kids while all of them are in their forties.And Ranbir can dance better than all three of them. He simply rocks in the party scene.
Katrina does what she does best: look sweet and beautiful.
Some of the dialogues are just too good.
Right now in our house we go around saying" Tum bahut achhe ho. I like you:"( You are very nice)
All in all: pasia wasool and then some.

The cold winter

2010-01-08T03:54:00.000-08:00

This picture was taken outside my house.

As I write this post, Oslo is as cold as the Arctic, with minus 20 outside. I have four heaters on in this room but my fingers are freezing as I type. I love my house, but being an old house, it tends to get quite cold.

Not just Norway but Europe is facing one of it's coldest winter in many years. Britain is reeling under a severe cold wave and five people have already lost their lives due to the cold wave sweeping over Europe. Britain is not used to the temperatures down to - 17 degrees as it has been in the past few days.
Here in Norway, we are more used to such cold temperatures around the new years but usually it lasts only for a few days. A normal winter has temperature down to - 6 or- - 8 during the two coldest months of the season: January and February. But this winter has been unusually cold. My son says they are not going out to play in the playground during the break because it is too cold. In other parts of Norway the temperatures have plummeted down to a - 40 degrees. A man froze to death two days ago on his way home. He had not worn any headgear, gloves and was using normal shoes. What was he thinking? That is pure suicide in - 40 degrees.

That was one of the things I learned here. Long woollen underwear. I remember my first winter.Every time I went out, I felt as if my legs had frozen like two ice cream sticks.It was later I found out that one has to have woolen under garments. A woollen cap, gloves and winter shoes. You look like a space creature with so much stuff on you. Those days I was more concerned about not having flat hair so I would often not wear a cap, until one day, I felt as if my ears were going to fall off.
I learned my lesson.

Anyway. Let us hope the cold wave ends soon. Yesterday the temperature rose a bit in the day. It was just minus six so were joking in the office" hey, it's almost summer out there!"
But summer is still six months away. We need to battle through a long and cold winter first:

The difference between a man and a woman

2010-01-05T11:09:00.000-08:00

I received this e-mail today and it was so funny I just had to share it with you all:)

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa , half discovered, half wild,
fertile and naturally beautiful!

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe , well developed and open to
trade, especially for someone with cash.

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain , very hot, relaxed and
convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece , gently aging but still a
warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain , with a glorious and
all conquering past.

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel , has been through war and
doesn't make the same mistakes twice, takes care of business.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada , self-preserving, but open
to meeting new people.

After 70, she becomes Tibet , wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past
and the wisdom of the ages...only those with an adventurous spirit and a
thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN

Between 1 and 70, a man is like Iran ... Ruled by Nuts.

Pre-teens

2010-01-02T14:47:00.000-08:00

It was bed time. I was tucking my little prince in for the night and as usual planted a kiss on his forehead and said" I love you, sweetheart, sleep tight."
I love you too, mom" he says.
Then grinning asks me" who do you think loves the other one more- me or you?"
"I love you more!" I tell him.
" No way! I love you more!"

Lately whatever it is, he wants to win the argument. I have had two rounds already since the morning where he insisted that I,as a grown up, was having more fun since I get to use the computer longer than he does. This because I had said that it's more fun being a kid.My comment that we are not buddies sharing a house but that I am infact the mother, who gets to decide was met with profound sulkiness. He sulked for a good couple of hours. Lately there's been a lot of that too. Sulking.
He has been quite argumentative recently.
" Pre-teens!" My friend who has a 12 year old at home, assured me.
So anyway, I was in no mood to drag another argument out so I said.
"Ok , you love me more...happy?"
He looked thoughtful and finally said, " Er...actually no."
" And why is that?"
" Well, I am thinking you love me less..."

"GOOD NIGHT!!" I practically yelled the words and made my escape...Phew!!

New years resolutions

2010-01-01T01:30:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year to all my blogger buddies! I wish the new decade brings with it peace and prosperity to all of you.

New year is also a time when we make new years resolutions and for the first time I don't have the usual long list...Why? Because I have kept the other resolutions!! There were resolutions like keeping away from certain troublesome people and situations that I always managed to get myself into. SO if I am feeling proud of myself it is with good reason.
So the resolutions for the new year? Ok these are also on going projects but I must say I haven't given it the same attention otherwise it isn't hard to achieve it either.
So here they are:

Lose weight.
Meet someone nice( this is the toughest one so am going to give it more than a year).
Write more on my book.

So that is all from me, folks! Hope you manage to keep yours:)Happy 2010.

The firangi in da house

2009-12-30T13:43:00.000-08:00

When he was two I tried to teach him Hindi but when I went to pick him up at the kindergarten , my son placed a hand on my lips and said" Please mamma, don't speak to me in that funny language!" I laughed and let it go thinking later...

But today I was listening to some Bollywood songs and I asked him what he thought of it and he replied" It's this strange music that you have always listened to!"
I stared at him and to my horror realised there is a firangi (foreigner)in the house and it is my son!! What have I done?! One day he is going to really be sorry I never taught him Hindi. So now I have to come up with a plan and soon or this ship will sail. Thank God though he speaks fluent English. I put my foot down when it came to English saying he will have to learn a language to communicate with my family in India.

He was quite upset when we were in India last year and told me many time he feels so left out. Then my relatives came over and there was so much Punjabi in the house that he got even more upset. One day he asked me what does " pussar gaya"( getting naughty) means, I realised he was catching up soon.
I think it is time to enroll him in a Hindi class.

Love of the tacky

2009-12-26T12:49:00.000-08:00

My friend who reads my blog decided to read " The Twilight" books and actually watch the film. So when I met her a couple of days ago she said" I can't believe you actually like that kind of stuff!! Seriously, who is all that crap written for?? Fourteen years old, right??"
I was having a very intelligent conversation prior to this so all I could do was give her one of my I-don't-what-to-say goofy grin.
" Hey, I am the one who dances to Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears!!" I finally reminded her.
It is true, my love for the tacky and the inane is an ill- concealed secret. I like all the intellectual stuff and love books and films that are award winners but there is a side of me that simply laps up all the silly stuff too. Like, I am totally into "The Vampire Diaries" these days but it's my guilty secret that I'm not ready to share yet with my friends. It's easier to blog about it. But it's all the doomed love shit that I love...all the cliches and the corny stuff.
It's just that sometimes the silly stuff gets your mind off serious issues. One can't be serious and intellectual ALL the time. It gets tedious. I love to be totally and insanely silly at times. It keeps me sane, somehow.

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-23T04:52:00.000-08:00

Just hung up the phone.The ex was on the line and we had a fight.I will spare you the details but suffice it to say that he was wrong...(I am always right ha ha ha!).
But it made me realise that the holidays is a season for solitude for some and for others it is a time where the whole family gathers and the tensions and disputes that have been lying dormant for years crackle up in the open through comments and looks.
I was once celebrating Christmas with some Norwegian friends and we had all gathered on Christmas eve to open the presents after the dinner is over and coffee and cakes are served. The two men in the family almost came to blows. The younger brother has always been secretly jealous of my friend who is the older one. So the younger brother kept making snide and sarcastic remarks until it got really out of hand. It was really unpleasant and sad. Their mother, with whom I have a very close friendship cried in the kitchen saying she didn't know how to bring her children together.
It really is sad. When we are children we fight over trivial things but when we grow older, we still fight sometimes but then the fights are uglier and nastier.
For many foreigners and even Norwegians, Christmas is a very lonely time. Christmas is such a family thing that if you don't have one, it is a very sad feeling to be walking around in town when everything is closed, even pubs and theaters.
The Salvation Army and and Christian charities organise Christmas dinners for those without a family.
Anyway,I have bought the presents and my account is drained so now I can relax and enjoy and yes, merry Christmas everyone!

The Christmas Frenzy

2009-12-16T14:11:00.000-08:00

Right now the Christmas hysteria is on full swing here and about to wreak a havoc on my personal economy( I was handed a two page long wish list by my son a few weeks ago...I told him that list will last for a few years!!)
Christmas is targetted towrads kids because the money sucking vampires in the toy industry know exactly how to grab the customers by the b-lls( pardon my language!).
It starts with commercials on the TV, then as if that is not enough, fliers about good bargains on toys flood mail boxes. I had put a sticker with " no commercials please" on m ine, until my son dismayingly wondered whatever happended to those nice pamphlets about toys on sale. I had kept a guilty silence but soon enough my secret was discovered and I confronted by an enraged boy, who felt as if his basic human rghts had been trampled upon. Like all doting parents, I admitted defeated and ripped off the sticker.
So when I saw the long list I was kicking myself.
" Look mom, it usually costs 999 kroner but now we can buy it on a discount for 899 kroner!It's a good bargain, mom!" he exclaims happily.
While it's all I can do to keep myself from letting out a big scream.I am not even a Christain and yet, Christmas has taken over my life.
And as if that isn't enough. All his friends have to have the kind of gifts he himself wishes for...so you are guessing right...X'mas is my financial ruin every year. Help!
But that is not all. Going to the malls during X'mas season is a headache. The malls are over crowded and you need to stand hours if you want to wrap a gift. Once I decided I was going to skip the wrapping part. I spent the X'mas eve wrapping up so many gifts that I was ready to buckle under the Christmas tree.

So anyway... they say "'tis the season to be jolly tra la la la ...2 but you won't find me singing just yet.

Obama- Veni Vidi Vici

2009-12-11T08:09:00.000-08:00

He came, he saw, he conquered. That sums up Barack Obamas whirlwind visit to Oslo, to receive the Noble Peace Prize.
Everyone is talking about the great speech. Not just here in Norway but also back home in the US, Obama has silenced his critics in such a charming and humble manner, it is amazing. To say that the speech is a masterpiec in rhetorics is stating the obvious but it is indeed a marvel how this great looking couple( I mean is Michelle Obama gorgeous or what??)has swept the Norwegians by storm.
However a lot of people are saying that his speech was in support of war. Actually,
he is absolutely right that non- violence cannot always be an answer to an invader.
the funny part is that the arguement for or against war is both right and wrong. It simply is a question of which perspective you want to look at it from.
But that is not what I am going to blog about.
We had an interesting discussion about Obamas mass appeal at our office today. Many people are now saying that in Bible and other religions they have predicted that one man will lead the world. He will be so charismatic that the whole world will be mesmerised by him but that he will prove to be evil...
There are some whispers about Obama being that man...but then again, it is pure speculation so I hope the CIA doesn't whisk me off to Guantanamo Bay...(!!)

Not that I believe this ( am a Obama- supporter) but it is indeed uncanny the way he has put the world under his spell. One woman at work said her mother loves Obama with all her heart, even more than her own husband even though she doesn't understand a word of what he says! That says it all.
There were thousands of people outside the Grand Hotel yesterday, waiting to catch a glimpse of Obama. Veni vidi vici.

Obama in Norway

2009-12-08T08:56:00.001-08:00

Norway is in a tizzy. The press is in a tizzy and well, I wonder if the king is in a tizzy too. The reason? Barack Obama is landing in Oslo in two days to receive the Noble Peace Prize. But if the intention of bestowing the Noble was to get Obama to visit Norway, it sure has not been what the Norwegians had expected. Or rather the Noble Peace Committee had hoped for, maybe. Obama has practically no time to meet journalists, or visit the exhibition gallery made in his honour. He has even declined a dinner invitation by King Harald. A royal snub, some say.
However,such is the popularity of this American President that there are over thousands of people wanting to attend the award ceremony on the 10 December. The Noble Peace Committee had said in a press statement that normally a lot of people decline the invitation to attend the ceremony but this year they have not received even a single cancellation.
Me, I received a polite letter of how I didn't make the list of invitees to the ceremony because they have received way too many requests. I am okay with that. I am still waiting to see what this president will do for the world or Americans.
But one thing is for sure: he is definitely one of the most popular men in the world.

The tortoise and the hare

2009-11-29T03:24:00.000-08:00

Slow and steady wins the race? I am just wondering about what is the success formula in the modern times? We seem to be moving further and further away from the old values.
The story of the The tortoise and the Hare is a classic one. In which the over confident hare loses the race, while the slow and steady tortoise wins it.
Do you think the story would have the same result today?
Picture this scenario:
Who will the boss choose for a promotion? The hare or the tortoise? Am afraid the answer will be the hare. Because the modern hare has learnt the art of sucking up to the boss and waking up just in the nick of time to beat the tortoise.
Who will be chosen? The quiet , shy girl with or the loud mouth, decked up girl?
Maybe am too cynical...I do hope am wrong but am I ?
Certain universal values like truth, honesty, sincerity and doing the right thing seems to be on the decline.
I see and hear people all round me lie through their teeth all the time. And it makes me wonder, how can they live with themselves?

Someitmes I get tired of being surrounded by shallow people, who have only one value: My, myself and I.

The Twilight saga- New Moon

2009-11-26T04:12:00.000-08:00

Just as I promised I went to see " Twilight- the New Moon" with two of my colleagues last evening. When we met up at Colosseum, my male colleague, looked around and asked me " Hey, Saroj, is this is a children's film?"
I glanced around and burst out laughing. Sure enough, we were lining up with a bunch of gangly teens and eager ten somethings!!
" Are you sure about this film?" He asked me, looking very sceptical. I had a sneaky feeling he regretted having said he wanted to join me and the other girl from work.
Anyway, we bought the goodies and started to watch the film.
The teens squealed and clapped when Edward Cullens( Robert Pattinson) appeared on the screen for the first time. I felt like I had gate crashed a teen party.
But then the film started.
So what happens next?
Bella and Edward had become a pair in the first film. In the second one he leaves her saying his family is moving. Since the vampires never age and have been around for some ten years people were beginning to wonder. Bella wants him to take her with him but he says" you are not good enough for me."
Bella is heart broken and goes into a depression as she pines for Edward.
Enter the wolf man, Jason. All muscles and brawn. My colleague, said" So from a vampire Bella goes to a werewolf...what next? In the next film she will fall in love with Frankenstein or what?"
Needless to say I went into paroxyms of laughter!!

Anyway, there is a red headed vampire who is thirsting for Bellas blood since Edward had killed her lover in the first film.
Jason the werewolf saves her. But Edward now thinks Bella is dead and wants to self destruct...He seeks permission to die from the Voultri cult, who are the only ones who can destroy vampires, since they are immortal or rather condemned to eternity without a soul. So everyone lands up in Italy, including Bella who wants to save Edward.
The rest is a Romeo Juliet thing. The impossible love. Throw in a triangle. Jason loves Bella...and well, there is your film.
Did I like it?
Yup, all of it. The parts where she is heart broken hit home big time. How can you ever forget the first heart break? The longing, the hope, the pining...the crying.

When the movie ended, abruptly and unexpectedly all three of us went..."WHAT???"
" I can't wait a whole year for the part three!!" we all were agonised.
All three of us made a beeline for the book shop to buy the next book.
The film disappoints in one way that there is little of Bella and Edwards story and more of Jason and Bella. After the first part, one wants more of these two. And Jason is great but he lacks the charisma of Edward Cullens.

It sort of reminds me of another great classic of vampire love Francis Ford Coppolas " Dracula".

PS: You can only enjoy this film if you allow your brain to regress to your teens. I guess am going through a serious regression these days!!!

Twilight

2009-11-21T15:10:00.000-08:00

" You are like my own personal brand of heroin..." he says.
HUH?? GULP...melt...big time...! Seriously, which high school girl will resist those lines from a guy who is dark, handsome and mysterious?
Of course, I may be totally jaded but that line had me rolling my eyes upwards but that's as far as I got coz this ultimate chick film got to me too. I guess, no amount of cynicism will cure me of romanticism.

I fianlly watched "Twilight" tonight. And liked it, even though I did get irritated at certain cliches. But it's not a movie to analyse. It just transports you back to high school and reminds you of mr. Unattainable, who had you dreaming and moaning...but he could never be yours. Of course, in real life he just didn't know you existed, nothing as dramatic as that he is a vampire, a vegetarian one coz he only eats animals, not humans...
The story? Hmm, ok Bella is this new girl in a small town called Forks in Washingtin. She is a quiet beauty. She meets Edward Cullens at High School and both are drawn to each other. Turns out mr.Dark and mysterious is hungering for her like you hunger for a big fat juicy burger!
" He looks at you like you are something to eat" says Mike in the film.
Precisely.
Edward has remained 17 years old since 1918( lucky guy).
" So did the lion fall in love with the lamb?" Edwars asks Bella.
" Stupid lamb" she says.
" And a masochistic lion" says Edward.

Ah, the cliches !! The cliches!!! Fall for them...don't think, just reach for the pop corn and be a teenager again...And oh yes, am going to watch the second film " New Moon" in the theaters.

New in Norway

2009-11-15T03:07:00.000-08:00

When I was new in Norway, one of the first things I did was join a Norwegian class. The first time I was given the lesson in Norwegian, I thought to myself" Oh dear, this is a language I will never master where "jeg" is pronounced "Yai". The only words I understood were "nei" and "ja" (no and yes).However, people I met were more than willing to speak English with me so I didn't have problems communicating but of course, I wanted to understand the language.
At the Norwegian language class, I made my first friend, a Yemenite jew from Israel. She was dusky and thin and had a deep voice. Israelis love Indians( atleast someone likes us ha ha ha !) so she immediately sat down next to me and we became friends. There was also a Palestinian man in our class who tried his best to be friends with the both of us. She would always rebuff his efforts and one day asked me not to talk to him.
I finally told her that this middle eastern conflict is something between them and my stand is neutral.
One day we were discussing Norwegians, so I told her that people here are very reserved and seem almost cold. They don't smile at you or seem friendly. I wondered about a remark a British woman had made to me when I told her I was going to Oslo.
" It's fucking cold out there and those guys probably drink more than the Russians!".She had remarked.
Another friend from Rumania had said the same thing,
" Norwegians drink too much, they are lolling around drunk on trams and buses!" But here I didn't find any drunkards so I was a bit baffled and thought to myself that it is so typical that false rumours afloat easily.

So when was talking to my Israeli friend about this, she lauhged and said, "come out Saturday night and you will meet a different Norway!!"
The following saturday we went to a pub in Karl Johan, the main street in downtown Oslo, to a place called "Scotsman" where her boyrfriend was a bartender and we were served free drinks.
Did I say the Norwegians were cold and reserved? I take back what I said. Under the influence of alcohol, they become so friendly and congenial.
Droves of men came by where we sat on the stool by the bar to check up to mørke skjønnheter( two dark beauties), they bought us drinks and were so outrageously flirtatious. My Israeli friend was laughing at my amazement.
" Welcome to the land of Dr. Jekyll and mr. Hyde!" she joked.

And it is true, they do drink a lot. My first job I went on a Julebord ( the annual Christmas dinner). But I will save it for my next post...
I lost touch with her once she moved back to Israel. She hated the cold.

My life as a dog

2009-11-11T07:14:00.000-08:00

I just watched this old Swedish classic and liked it so much I decided to write a post on it. It won a Golden Globe in 1987 and if you watch it you will understand why.
The story is based in the 50's, about a boy of 10-11 years old, Ingmar(Anton Glanzelius) gets into all sorts of trouble, which drives his mother (Anki Lidén) crazy; Ingemar does not know that his mother is in fact terminally ill. When he and his older brother become too much for her, they are split up and sent to live with relatives. Ingemar ends up with his maternal uncle Gunnar (von Brömssen) and his wife Ulla (Kicki Rundgren) in a small rural town in Småland.
He experiences lots of new things, but he has a constant inner dialogue with his mother, whom he wants to tell so many things but she was too tired to listen to his stories. He also longs for his dog Sickan, who was a great comfort to him when things got too chaotic at home.

Throughout the film, Ingemar tells himself over and over that it could have been worse, reciting several examples, such as a man who took a shortcut onto the field during a track meet and was killed by a javelin and the story of the dog Laika several times, the first creature sent into orbit by the Russians (without any way to get her back down).Laika dies up in space when the food supply finishes.

The film depicts brilliantly the agony of two brothers put under circustances beyond their control. Both of them deal with the fact their mother is terminally ill differently. The older brother tells Ingmar not to cry and be a sissy when they go to visit their mother at the hospital. He himself deals with his grief by being rowdy and constantly shooting with his play rifle.
It is a must- see film. Lasse Hallström does a great job in the film.

Jay Sean

2009-11-05T12:27:00.000-08:00

These days am totally in love with this song. I was unaware of this singer Jay Sean until yesterday, when my colleague at work sent me a link on mail...and since then I can't stop listening to it.

Yesterday it snowed in Oslo...a sort of thin sleet, that quickly melted away. The first snow is always like this. The real snow comes towards teh end of December. But the days are getting grey and darker.
They call it mørke tiden ( dark times) here. It lasts for about 2 months and is one of the toughest periods of the Norwegian winter. Because you don't see the sun ( just barely ). The sky looks clouded and grey and by the time it is four pm it is already pitch dark outside. So in winter when you leave for work it is dark and when you come home, it is dark again. In the afternoon there is a dull light that settles like a grey mood over the city. I swear, even the buildings and roads look sad then!!
It took me a long time to get used to this part of the winter. Many people here go into depression during these 2 months. I remember my first winter here in 1993. I couldn't stop crying and I didn't even know why I was so sad.
Of course, it was also because being new in Norway is very very hard. Making friends is a real uphill battle. The only " friends" I had were people I met at my Norwegian class. We were sort of foisted upon each other, despite our different backgrounds. I met some Indians who are born and brought up here but they were even more Norwegian than the Norwegians themselves! So they ignored me.My efforts at friendliness were snubbed and they took it as a sign that og this new girl sorts of wants to muscle into our social life. In other clutures one sort of tries to include the newcomer. Here it is the opposite. The newcomers are left on their own.
Just yesterday I was telling someone that Norway is the only country where it took me many years to make real friends. I have lived in many countries but this was the frist time I experienced that socialising is very selective and restrictive. Many foreigners feel extremely isolated because of it.
Of course with time, I made friends. And the thing is once you make friends with a Norwegian, they are your friends forever.

But beating the winter blues is still an art am struggling to master.
I have bought lots of fragrant candles and have decided that I will make a romantic ambience in my house. And soft romantic music like the song by Jay Sean here, is the perfect antidote to winter blues. So ...Ride it...the winter blues..

The freedom of expression

2009-11-01T11:30:00.000-08:00

I was reading Shobha De's blog post and was really saddened to read about how M.F.Hussain has had to flee from Mumbai because of Bajrang Dal. Of course being the journalist I am I did try to get more information about the controversy, about him painting the Hindu deities in the nude while painting muslim subjects with their clothes on. However to be fair here, I feel why are Hindus so annoyed about it? Didn't the ancient sculptors make our Goddesses in the nude? Is Bajrang Dal going to blow up Khajuraho too like the Taliban did with Bamiyan statues of Buddha?
When I was in India once with a Norwegian and was showing him the national museum, I asked him later what he liked the most?
" The sexy Goddesses !" He laughed. I had to smile with him. I know there was no intention to offend.
However, M.F.Hussain is a muslim and that alone is fuel enough to the fire the Bajrang Dal goons are spreading all over India.I can understand that his paintings may seem offensive to many, but I do believe that artists should have the freedom to paint as they feel.

The bane of modern democracy is that nearly everything is being politicised. I found a website that objected to his paintings and though I could understand that it may offend my Brahmin friend( with whom I have had countless discussions on such subjetcs) all I could think was that he is a great artist. I have always admired his art. Take a look here ( scroll down till you see the paintings)and judge for yourself.
I think he should be allowed to return home to his Mumbai. He is 94 years old. Isn't hinduism about peaceful co-existence?

Bollywood undone

2009-10-27T10:25:00.000-07:00

These days I have been walking past all shops in Grønland selling Bollywood videos and don't feel tempted to buy one. The reason? I feel the new string of Bollywood films have lost their appeal somewhat. They are too slick, too glitzy and way too western. The last film I watched was Dil Bole Hadippa because I really like Rani Mukerjee ( who doesn't after Kuch Kuch Hota Hai?. Apart from her portrayal of the prodigal sardarjee and Shahids wooden good looks the film was a disappointment.
Bollywood has always plagiarised Hollywood from Sholay ( a take off on The Good, the bad and the Ugly)to the recent Ghajni( a take off on Memento )
Yet most copies did have a typical Bollywood stamp in clothes and style. Many were so tacky( remember Disco Dancer?)but it was fun to watch...so that one could actually laugh.
But the recent posters of Blue or London Dreams just don't tempt me to watch. Who are these characters I thought to myself? Lara Dutt looks like she could give Angelina Jolie a run for her money, Akshay trying a Keanu Reeves a la PointBreak...atleast on the posters.
Are these Indians?
That is just my point. Most Bollywood films these days project the upper class urbanised India, their problems, their world. The real India is forgotten totally. You would have to punish me to make me watch Wake up, Sid! with Ranbir Kapoor. I watched the trailer and it seemed like a typical comedy from Hollywood. If I want Hollywood, I will go for the real thing. It just isn't fun anymore watching Bollywood films. The characters no longer seem Indian. The novelty of watching the rich urban India has worn off. I loved Jaane tu ya jaane na though because it had a certain honesty to it. A lot of youngsters are like that these days, so it was credible.
It is just that when you travel in India, it is a different a reality. Not these glitzy ones. Earlier, you had both the glamourous films but you also had the desi versions where the villge belle won the heart of the city boy. But now the farmer girl is too well coiffed and has the perfect figure and style. Whatever happened to the kisan ( farmer), the angry common man or the boy next door. One could identify with them. But the guys now all have six packs and the actresses are former beauty queens. That is not the common India.
I miss watching films about themes that don't just concern the urban India. So maybe that is why I like watching old films with all the Bollywood cliches in it. Here is a clip of a song I like a lot, before Bollywood was totally urbanised:

A daughter all her life

2009-10-26T13:05:00.000-07:00

"Your son is your son till he takes a waife
Your daughter is your daughetr all your life"

Reading ZB's post I was reminded of this old saying and my own relationship with my parents, especially my father with whom I had a love- hate relationship most of my life. It was only when he was dying that I realised just how much I wanted him to live. I forgot everything I held against him. I have always blamed my failed relationships with boyfriends and my ex on him, feeling I was given this script when I was born" The girl who will always be searching for the impossible".
When I was a littel girl, I used to fight with my sister for the place next to my father, whenever we ate dinner.
But not matter what I did, whether I came first in my class, it was always my sister he doted on.
So then I grew angry and decided " Huh, I don't need his attention!"
As a teenager I rebelled like crazy. My dad nicknamed me "Terrorist humari family ka". I promptly named him" The Hitler" He was very offended and stoutly declared he wasn't one. Of course when he was in that mood we simply nodded in fear.
As I grew older I realised to my deep chagrin that he was right about a lot of things...life experience does give your parents a huge edge over you.

Then he died last year and I have had to work through a gamut of feelings in the past year that followed. I had to deal with my anger and disappointment towards him and finally make my peace with him and forgive him for the times he had hurt me.
It was only after becoming a parent myself, I understood that no matter what children do, parents will always love them.
I was so focused on my relationship with my father that I never gave my mother much thought. It is only now I have understood just how much I have taken her for granted. As long as I lived with her, she always woke me up with a cup of chai. Sometimes, she would want to talk to me after I had been out all day with friends and I didn't have the patience and would just tell her later. I realise now how tough it must have been for her travelling around the world, taking care of three chidren and a dominating and demanding husband. She is so lost now, without him, it breaks my heart. I fought a lot with her but now I worry about her constantly. Just the slighest trace of sadness in her voice makes me call her long distance twice a day. I know that the way she can talk to me and my sister, she cannot with others. I wish I could be near her and make up for all the years we fought. But most of all I want her to know that I finally appreciate all the sacrifices she has made for us. And that every day I pray to God to give me many more years with my mother. I never thought of parents growing old and dying until last year.
I think we owe it to them. To make them feel loved and cared for. Now it is our turn. We shouldn't turn our backs on them. They didn't when we were young and defenceless. Now it is they who are old and defenceless.
Yes, am going to be a daughter all my life.

State of Play

2009-10-25T05:38:00.000-07:00

I watched this thriller last night. The film is based on a six part British series made by BBC in 2003 but the plot is shifted to Washington.
The story starts with the murder of congressman Stephen Collins( Ben Affleck) mistress. He is investigating a billion dollar comapany that has operastions in Iraq and Afghanistan. The case gets wide media coverage and Collins seeks help from his college pal Cal Mc Affery ( Russel Crowe). Cal works as crime reporter for a news paper,The Globe, with a dragon lady Cameron( Helen Mirren) as the boss.
As Cal begins to dig into the murder of Stephens mistress, he finds a lot of disturbing things. Della ( Rachel Mc Adams) is a young reporter who writes a blog on Capitol Hill, is also assigned on the case with Cal.
The plot thickens as suspicions point to someone in the Congress behind the whole thing.
The murdered mistress has a dubious past, with a lot of dirt that is unearthed by the journalists.

Russel Crowe is excellent as a wry reporter, good at his work but demanding and difficult.
The film is also interesting for journalists and their ethical role. Like the time when Cal and Della get hold of crucial evidence but don't hand it over to the police and wait. This results in one more murder and they get a lot of flak from the police.

But I simply loved Helen Mirren in the role of a tough editor. Robin Wright Penn looks her gorgeous self as the offended wife of the congressman Collins.But she is sort of wasted in a small role but leaves an impression nonetheless.

Ben Affleck tries hard to act well but doesn't impress. The scenes where he sheds tears do not seem convincing, or maybe that was the whole point( acting out the wily politician). However he looks good. A bit too thin though.
Russel Crowe is great as usual. He just sort of slips into any character effortlessly and delivers a good performance. Rachel Adams looks pretty.

Just the kind of movie you want to watch, curled up on a sofa with popcorn, on a saturday. But be prepared to sit up as the thriller will keep you glued to the screen.

The Narcissist

2009-10-16T13:15:00.000-07:00

Old habits die hard...there are many proverbs that are so apt.
I have mentioned in my earlier posts this strange fascination I have towards difficult people. People who are beautiful but truly twisted inside. Earlier I have used so much energy, time and feelings on a particular type of personality- Narcissitic personality- the totally self absorbed and selfish person.
Yet for some strange reason, or maybe subconsciously I seek tem too, this personality shows up in my life in some form or other.
I have this strange urge to "save" them. They are tortured souls, that the world gives up on. I have been told am too full of empathy and indeed it really is hard for me to see someone in pain.
But the thing is, this type is beyond saving. They are truly doomed.
Yesterday, I realised it all over again that this personality had once again entered my life.
As usual there is always drama around this personality. They thrive on conflicts and drama. So when I was sitting in the cafe, it occured to me" you can't save this one, Saroj. Just give up."
So I did. I just walked away. When you meet a narcissist there is just one thing to do- run the other way...and fast!!

Sexual harrassment

2009-10-10T10:50:00.000-07:00

Yes, I am writing about a prickly topic. I am sure most women at some point in their lives have been subjected to unwanted and unwarranted attention from a male at a work place.
I am just wondering: do the men realise what is termed as sexual harrassment?
At my job there are a few very young and very pretty girls who I see often receive (what I call)lecherous looks from their male colleagues. One young girl, who is simply beautiful told me about one earlier colleague who would often try to chat with her. The guy was atleast 50 if he was a day! He was old enough to be her dad.
Of course I have also experienced this kind of attention. A couple of years back I was working at this organisation and this guy( married with four kids) would always accidentally rub against me with his hands. The first time it happened, I thought, that happens. Howwever, I noticed that such accidents were happening at a rapid rate whenever he was around.
In my younger days I have borne such behaviour in silence and just left it at that. However I have sharpened with age and one day when he brushed against me I shot back at him" Can you never talk to me without somehow touching me?" My tone was a whiplash. The guy simply froze in silence, he never expected to hear such a thing, spoken loudly so that everyone heard it!

Just the other day I bumped into him again and he came towards me, seemingly to congratulate me on my new position but the leering look he gave me as he said it made me regret I had worn tight slacks, as his lecherous stare travelled down my legs. I couldn't help saying " I see you still oogle at the ladies...your poor wife" He disappeared like thin air in no time.

The funny part is I am left feeling like a bitch whereas it is he who is crossing the limits of decency.
Of course, women love attention from men. But not this kind.
On the other hand there is one young guy who flirts outrageously with girls, though he has a girl friend, yet he does it in such a manner that it is charming and not offensive.

The line between sleaze and charm is often hard to define. It is in the way the person is left feeling.
The girls at work tell me sometimes what the male colleagues say to them and I am often appalled.
Yet they don't make a fuss about it. But recently one young girl had to take a leave of sickness because of sexual harassment.
Most women deal with it either in silence or they lash back like me but the point is it shouldn't be happening at all.

Obama and the Nobel Peace Prize

2009-10-09T11:49:00.000-07:00

Obama is surprised. The Americans are surprised. The world is surprised. The media is going haywire.The question on everyones lips is: Does he desereve the Nobel Peace Prize?
I must say am a bit blank on this one. It does seem a bit premature and populistic of the Nobel peace Committee to give him this award so early into his term in the White House.
However, to many, even those who are not living in America, Obama is a symbol of hope that the right will prevail. His " Yes we can" slogan during the US elections is nearly as powerful as Martin Luther Kings " I have a dream " speech.
It wasn't just the Americans, the whole world watched with abated breath the outcome of the US elections.
I never dreamed that this would happen during my lifetime: that the worlds mightiest nation will elect an African American as their president. But it did happen. And Obama may not have achieved the vision he has of America but he is a symbol of hope to the world.
However this guy here convinced me Obama deserves it. Peace everyone!

With Glasses

2009-10-05T13:22:00.000-07:00

Today my son and I went to the optician and he got his eyes tested. Sure enough, he needs glasses. I had a suspicion that his eyesight wasn't so good so I talked it over with my family and friends from India. Their reaction really bugged me. " Og my God! How did this happen?" or " He shouldn't have been watching too much TV" etc etc.
I had to remind them that there is something called genes. I wear glasses thick as the bottom of the old coke bottles( when coke came in glass bottles), My grandmother was almost blind, so it shouldn't be such a shock that he has inherited my poor eyesight.
It made me realise how hung up we Indians are on such things that actually one has no control over: like height, bad eye sight, skin colour and many other physical things.
I remember when I had gone to get my eyes tested, way back in Delhi, there was also a 12 year old girl there for her eyetest. Her father was sitting there almost in grief that his daughter was getting glasses. " Her eyes were her most beautiful feature and now even they are ruined" he said.
The doctor checking the girls eyes told him" Arre, aise kyon bol rahe hain? ( why are you saying that?) She is still the beautiful girl with pretty eyes. "

Even the Indian matrimonial ads ask for girls without glasses, not using contact lenses.
Anyway, I told my son today that he is still my gorgeous son and if anyone says somthing just tell them that most intelligent people use glasses.

Anna from Afghanistan

2009-09-25T14:14:00.000-07:00

Anna Anka, the Swedish wife of Paul Anka has managed to create a furore in Scandinavia with her statements on a popular TV show " Skavlan". There people who are cheering her up but also a large number who are giving her the thumbs down.
According to mrs. Anka, who is a former Playboy model, it's a womans responsibility to statify her husband and if he needs a blow job in the mornings then she should oblige him. She also makes a dig at over weight people while claiming she has one of the best bodies in the world( if you like the sinewy scrawny tpe, that is !)

The closet chauvenists are clapping her honest views while others like me don't know if we should laugh, cry or simply ignore this woman whose only claim to fame is her half naked pictures in the Playboy in the 90's and that she is married Paul Anka.

I cannot help but marvel at the strange irony and hypocrisy in the fact that on one hand some people while calling the new Afghan law (where a woman who denies sex to her husband can be punished by denying her food by her provide husband )as barbaric and suppression of women, applaud such idiots like Anna Anka and Hanna Nabintu for their so- called outspokeness and guts to say it like it is.
Growing up among Indians I remember the topics that created a debate were whether a womans place is in the kitchen or at work.
Many men were dead against women working. " The womans job is at home, not in a work place."
Arguments would ensue if some women would say what is wrong with women working?
These were mostly Punjabi men who are known to be extremely conservative when it comes to their women.

However someitmes I hear the same kind of arguments from Norwegian men and that is baffling. Has the gender battle in Scandinavia gone so awry that people are actually applauding old chauvenistic views still prevalent in many so- called developing countries? But the truth is that gender equality is far from totally achieved in Scandianvia, despite the fact that women here have more rights than anywhere else in the world.
The boardrooms are still a boys club here and they are talking of quotas for women in higher positions( wonder what Anna Anka thinks of that? )
Anna Anka is a Gods gift to male chauventistic pigs ( MCP).
Now just imagine a muslim woman saying such a thing on TV. Lets say Mullah Krekars wife said the same thing on "Skavlan"? Would even one such chauvenist applaud ?
Am sure she will be pitied and ridiculed as yet another brainwashed suppressed mulsim woman and there would be loud demands for sending her back to Iraq.
I am serioulsy beginning to wonder if Anna Anka is living in the wrong part of the world. Someone please buy her a ticket to Afghanistan soon.

De-stress

2009-09-20T22:28:00.000-07:00

It is monday morning and am sitting with my cup of tea and bracing myself for the day. My day starts at 6.3o am, some light yoga to get me through eight hours of sitting by my desk on a computer. I wake up my son at 7.30 am and he is almost always in a bad mood in the moringings( it must be the low sugar levels that transform me into a bugging mom from the loving mom who tucked him into bed last night).

So the one factor that is high in my life is the stress factor. I suppose the busy lives we lead and the stress at work ( there is a deadline tomorrow and am sure we are still running short of stuff so...)
Stressing has become a way of life in most societies. It has become a part of our lives but did you know that prolonged stress can do a lot of scary things to your body? Like cause digestive disorders, heart poblems and hold on,even osteoprosis!!
So I decided to write a post on how to de stress: here are some simple methods which do help:

Ways to relax your mind

* Write. It may help to write about things that are bothering you. Write for 10 to 15 minutes a day about stressful events and how they made you feel. Or think about starting a stress journal. This helps you find out what is causing your stress and how much stress you feel. After you know, you can find better ways to cope.
* Let your feelings out. Talk, laugh, cry, and express anger when you need to. Talking with friends, family, a counselor, or a member of the clergy about your feelings is a healthy way to relieve stress.
* Do something you enjoy. This can be:
A hobby, such as gardening.
A creative activity, such as writing, crafts, or art.
Playing with and caring for pets.
Volunteer work.
You may feel that you're too busy to do these things. But making time to do something you enjoy can help you relax. It might also help you get more done in other areas of your life.
* Focus on the present. Meditation and guided imagery are two ways to focus and relax your mind.
Meditate. When you meditate, you focus your attention on things that are happening right now. Paying attention to your breathing is one way to focus. For more information, see:

Ways to relax your body

* Exercise. Regular exercise is one of the best ways to manage stress. Walking is a great way to get started. Even everyday activities such as housecleaning or yard work can reduce stress. Stretching can also relieve muscle tension. For more information about becoming more active, see the topic Fitness.

* Try techniques to relax. Breathing exercises, muscle relaxation, and yoga can help relieve stress.

Breathing exercises. Doing progressive muscle relaxation. It is a special method where you tense each muscle in your body and then relax it.

Yoga, tai chi, and qi gong. These techniques combine exercise and meditation. You may need some training at first to learn them. Books and videos are also helpful. You can do all of these techniques at home.

So happy de-stressing folks!! Have a good week all:)

Whitney back on track

2009-09-19T11:59:00.000-07:00

One would think being rich and famous would somehow exempt you from making the mistakes many women make: holding onto to an abusive relationship.
Whiteny Houston has finally broken free from a bad marriage to Bobby Brown. What impressed me the most was how she finally got out of it. Her mother( she must be one heck of a mom)came to her house with a court injunction and told her it's just not worth it.
How many Indian girls get that kind of support from their families who simply watch on silently as their daughters are abused and sometimes even charred to death by abusive males?
Hats off of to this mother. Here is part of the interview aired on Oprah:

Oprah: Your mama came to your house with the sheriff?

Whitney: She said, "It's not worth it." She said: "If you move, Bobby, [the sheriff will] take you down. Don't you make one move." And he stood there like he was scared.

And she said: "Let's go. Let's do this. I'm not losing you to the world. I'm not losing you to Satan. I'm not doing this. I want my daughter back. I want you back. I want to see that glow in your eyes. That light in your eyes. I want to see the child I raised. And you weren't raised like this. And I'm not having it. So you make a choice, and you make it here today because I have a court injunction that says you have to go." ...

Oprah: Was your mother saying you have to go to rehab, or was your mother saying you have to get out of this marriage?

Whitney: You have to go to rehab and make a decision with a clear mind.

It is great to have Whitney back on track.

The new disease of our times

2009-09-16T14:07:00.000-07:00

I just read a great article on mental illness.
Mental illness is increasing in all countries. In Norway the number of people who are getting disability money( uføretrygd) has become a subject of hot discussions. Many people are disabled and excluded from work because they are deemed as mentally unfit to work.
Yet depression is a now as common as catching a cold. I have even met people who do not even realise or are in denial that they are depressed.
I think there should be greater awareness around the subject and it should not be a taboo to talk about it. I know people who use a lot of energy trying to conceal from others that they actually feel like shit inside and think of jumping off a cliff on a bad day but dare not show it for others.
I knew one girl who was quite an annoying girl, actually. She would somehow always end up in conflicts with others and did bizzare things like stealing someone's dog and bringing it to my apartment one winter morning. It was minus ten outside and she had passed by this house in Skøyen and saw the dog shivering outside. She rang the bell and aked the owners to let the dog in since it was so cold.
Two hours later when she passed by the house again, she was furious to find the dog still outside and simply brought the dog home to my place.
" But that is stealing !" I exclaimed, horrified that I had been drawn into a theft.

The story came in the papers, with owners wondering where their darling dog had disappeared and suspected an angry blonde who had earlier asked them to let the dog in.
The headline read" Where is our darling Frida?"
I stared at the dog she had named and said loud to nobody in particular" Oh my God, Frida is here!"

Needless to say the dog was restored to the owners.
So what happened to the girl? Two years later she committed suicide. In the note she left behind,she wrote that nobody wanted her. This world had rejected her. I was filled with utter guilt because after the dog episode, I had avoided her too, lik emost people she encountered.
The girl was suffering from a bipolar disease. Manic depression.

It is time we treat the issue with more kindness and understanding rather than prejudice and silence.

Patrick Swayze

2009-09-15T12:35:00.000-07:00

I just had to write a post on Parick Swayze. Can't get over the fact that he is gone.

I still remember my sister had seen the film first and came home running to tell me about this new gorgeous guy Patrick something in a film called " Dirty Dancing" and how I must see it because as she said " You should go see it, Saroj! He is just the kind you fall for!!"
So sure enough I went to see the film and came out of the theater on cloud nine...oh yes, Patrick was my type and then some!! Those smouldering looks he gives Jennifer Grey in Dirty Dancing had me dreaming it was me...I have been a fan since then.
I absolutely adored him in "Ghost" though I must say " Roadhouse" wasnt the best.
" Point Break" was really good too.
Patrick was never the Arnold type, though he had a slim lithe physique. He was more the soft spoken gentleman type that I like. I have never liked the loud muscular types anyway.
I was really upset when I read that he had cancer( the dreaded cancer strikes again!)last year. I remember googling up pancreatic cancer and feeling so weepy when I read it was terminal because it usually is discovered very late.
He didn't even make it to sixty. Patrick leaves behind so many fans like me who love him.
Dirty Dancing is still one of my favourite films. It is the ultimate chick flick.

Jens We Can

2009-09-14T22:02:00.000-07:00

And so the thriller is over and the people have voted- Jens we can! (Jens is pronounced as Yens in Norwegian)
Jens Stoltenberg Ap ( the Labour party ) got a new vote of confidence from the people in Norway.The Labour Party is again the winner but it has been a touch and go situation in many places.

Being a journalist am supposed to be neutral but it is hard I must say. Not that I have been over the moon with the present coalition of the ruling parties( AP, Sv and Sp) but the alternatives are more scary for me as an immigrant.

I slept late last night so this will be a short post.

However I did read with profound sadness that Patric Swayze lost the battle to
cancer last night. I was a huge fan so am really sad. May he rest in peace. He died at 57. Cancer claims yet another celebrity.

Poverty in Norway

2009-09-10T14:09:00.000-07:00

Photo: Flickr.com

There are 85.000 children in Norway who are poor in Norway. However the definition of poverty is different as compared to poverty in India or other poor countries.

In a country with a total population of 4,6 millions, that is a whopping number. A new report by Fafo ( A Research and Analysis institution) has come up with this alarming news.
And not surpirsingly the report reveals that it is largely the children from immigrant families and especially single mothers with an immigrant background that fall in the category of poor in Norway. Many are living on welfare and others though are working, fall into the low income bracket.
In reality it means a lot of children are growing up in poverty , watching their counterparts enjoying the activities they themselves cannot participate in because their parents do not have the moeny to send them there.

Four years ago, the number of poor children was 50.000. During an election debate our present finance minister Kristin Halvorsen ( Socialist Left) had vowed to eradicate poverty saying it was a shame that children in Norway were growing up in poverty. During her four year reign as the finance minister, she forgot totally about her promise to the poor who voted her into the Parliament. Norway as a country flourished with even The New York Times praising Kristin for steering Norway away from the Financial crisis the rest of the world is reeling under. But the poor in Norway got poorer, much to her embarrassment.
Today, thanks to inflation, the number of poor children has almost doubled. Recently under an election campaign( the general elections will be held on monday, 14 september) she was pinned to the wall about her last electoral promise. She was stumped. The Fafo report left her speechless. She finally came out with an official apology to the poor.
In my book, she was let off easy.
A mere "sorry"will not help these children. Her apology is more like salt on the wounds for many. They need more than a mere sorry.

Erling Lae,( Conservative Party), the head of the City Council says employment is the answer. I have a news flash for him: many of these children have parents who do have jobs- low paying jobs. The Conservative Party has the majority in the City Council and have voted down proposals that would help the poor families, saying work is the answer.
I have one more news flash for him: jobs aren't exactly waiting in linefor many immigrants here. Some are too sick to work. And others, like the Somalians who are fairly new in the country, are struggling with war traumas, illetracy and lack of language skills.

Norway is one of the most expensive countries to live in. Food and rent is murderously expensive( and I know what am talking about!). The price index is adjusted according to a model of two income families. That leaves the one income families struggling with high prices.

People often argue that they are not poor as compared to the poor in Africa or Asia. They have food and clothes and a roof above their heads. Well, so do the slum kids. They have food on the table too, even if it is a thin daal ( lentil) soup , they also have clothes on their body, even if it is a ragged shirt and yes, they have a roof above their heads too, so what if it is a tin roof that leaks during the monsoon?

Children growing up in Norway have not seen slums to be thankful for their own situation. How sad is it for a kid to lie and say he/she won't come to a birthday party, not because he/she doesn't want to but because they know their mother doesn't have the money to buy a present?
In one of the richest countries in the world poverty is indeed a shame. And even worse when we have a welfare state that should ensure that no child is feels left out. When will our politicians wake up?

The silent killer

2009-09-09T12:47:00.000-07:00

I just read that the gorgeous actress Lisa Ray has been diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma, a rare cancer of the bone marrow, which is incurable and I got a lump in my throat. Anju Gandhi has also written a post on cancer. Lisa Ray is a beautiful Canadian- Bengali actress, who played in the Oscar nominated film Water, a highly recommended film.

Cancer is a dreadful disease but when you lose someone close to you, who is diagnosed with cancer, you become an involuntary witness to the terrible pain it causes its patients.

Last year I lost my father to lung cancer and it has been one of the hardest things I have been through in my life.
Cancer patients suffer so much pain that it really cannot be described in words. And the slow wasting away is almost unbearable. First he couldn't go up and down the stairs, then he couldn't go to the bathroom, then he couldn't stand, then he couldnt sit...in the end he couldn't even turn over on his side on the bed.
I remember I cried when he asked me to turn him over. To see my father like that...reduced to a mere shadow of himself. He, who loved life, his whisky pegs, his Britney Spears CD's ( yeah , he loved Baby hit me one more time), in the end he was almost blind and emaciated.
It is painful to even write about it. After his death, I was engulfed with this immense grief. I just couldn't understand why he had to die like this ...with so much pain?

Since then, everytime I read of someone who has cancer, I cry. Because I know how painful the end will be.

According to the American Cancer Society 7, 6 million people died of cancer in 2007. So cancer is our ages largest killer. It is also called the silent killer because often when it is diagnosed it has reached the fourth stage before it claims its victim to death.
The world should invest more money in cancer research and try to find a cure. I know we all have to die but losing someone to cancer feels so brutal, untimely and unfair. One is left wishing" if only he/ she had been diagnosed earlier...or that there was a cure."

For my father and also for Lisa Ray, it is too late. But if cancer research is given more attention and money, we may prevent this silent killer from causing more deaths.
Lisa Ray says she is going to fight cancer. I wish her all the luck and my prayers.